Sunday, 21 February 2021

The Lenten temptations of Eccles

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1. So, the season of Lent having arrived, Eccles went into the wilderness to pray. 2. And the Devil came unto him in his hermitage, and sai...
5 comments:
Tuesday, 16 February 2021

The Wind in the Vatican

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With apologies to Kenneth Grahame "Do you know," said the Brand-Moler, blissfully drinking a huge tankard of German beer as he ...
6 comments:
Saturday, 13 February 2021

Jesus asks "What would Francis do?"

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Jerusalem, AD 31 Jesus of Nazareth, the young preacher who is rapidly building up a reputation for His ability to change water into wine, ...
2 comments:
Saturday, 6 February 2021

The book of Covidicus, Chapter 13: the AstroLogica Vixen

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Continued from Chapter 12 1. It had been decided that all the world should be Vaxed, and the wise men produced a vixen to protect the peop...
2 comments:
Thursday, 4 February 2021

A man for all Zuhlsdorfs

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A new production of A man for all seasons , describing the martrydom of St John Z, has been announced. Obviously the script is too long for ...
4 comments:
Saturday, 30 January 2021

Even Pope Francis can't answer this!

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Here is today's brain teaser: How can one explain to children that - for example - their mother, abandoned by their father and often n...
7 comments:
Thursday, 28 January 2021

Catholics For Genocide

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Some personal news: I'll be joining Catholics For Genocide as their Director of Communications and Strategy on February 1st. As a Christ...
4 comments:
Sunday, 24 January 2021

Miracles are just a bit... unlikely

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After our piece from Brian Cox , aged 13, explaining that science rules out the existence of the soul, another clever child has sent us a...
4 comments:

Science rules out the existence of the soul

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Hello, my name is Brain Cox , aged 13, of St Dawkins' Comprehensive Shcool, Oldham. I am a very clever boy, and top in Sceince, which is...
2 comments:
Friday, 22 January 2021

How Eccles became a devout Catholic

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After watching events on the other side of the Atlantic, I decided that it was time to look more holy. Obviously, being a devout Catholic is...
6 comments:
Thursday, 21 January 2021

Jupich Iscariot condemns statement from the other 11 disciples

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Jerusalem Times, Good Friday, AD 33. Cardinal Jupich Iscariot, winner of the World Cup of Bad Apostles, today condemned a statement from t...
7 comments:
Tuesday, 12 January 2021

Requiem Mass for Twitter victims

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We shall be holding a Requiem Mass for all those slain by the tyrant Rasputin "Jack" Dorsey in the recent Twitter massacres. Top o...
3 comments:
Saturday, 9 January 2021

Covidicus, Chapter 12: Lockdown again

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Continued from Chapter 11. 1. At the end of the year the Emperor Macron of the Frenchites ended the great war, and the children of Bri-tai...
3 comments:
Thursday, 7 January 2021

Did John-Paul II and Benedict XVI inspire the Washington riot?

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Part of a newly-discovered manuscript by Agatha Christie. Miss Marbles was a white-haired old lady with a gentle appealing manner, and kn...
3 comments:
Wednesday, 6 January 2021

A-men and A-woman: the hidden A-gender

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Pastor Emanuel Cleaver, part-time Democratic Congressman and part-time United Methodist minister (so managing to serve God and Mammon at the...
2 comments:
Sunday, 3 January 2021

How to be popular with Pope Francis

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Over now to Dublin, where the newly-appointed archbishop, Dermot Farrell , is consulting his spiritual director, Monsignor Gríma Wormtongue...
6 comments:
Tuesday, 29 December 2020

How to revive a dead Apostolic Exhortation

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This is the latest instalment in our series "How to be a good pope", intended mainly for those who one day expect to be sleeping w...
3 comments:
Sunday, 27 December 2020

Christians are white supremacists

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We are truly grateful to one Jen Bokoff for reminding us that "Merry Christmas" is a white supremacy slogan, and a sign to the wor...
5 comments: