Saturday 8 September 2012

Catholic must-reads

No Popery

"NO POPERY" - the Tablet's motto. But what was it originally?

Fr Tim Finigan explores the history of the Tablet, once a Catholic newspaper of repute but now a home for those rejecting orthodox Catholicism. He explains that originally it was produced on stone tablets - hence the name - as a journal of record. Its motto was "NO PAPYRI." However, when it became a serious competitor in the Andrex market, its customers complained of severe discomfort, and so it was printed on paper instead. Curiously, many people still find that the Tablet is a pain in the backside.


The new-look cover of the Tablet

This week's Tablet - an Atheist "must-read" - contains theological and philosophical articles from Yootha Nazier, Abe Ortion and Eugene Ix, explaining how the Catholic church needs to change in order to survive. Also there's a prize competition - simply complete the following sentence in not more than 10 words, and win a night out with the Obamas.


Archbishop Tartaglia

Archbishop Tartaglia

Over in the Telegraph, Damian Thompson, a former editor of the Catholic Herald, shows that he has not lost his touch as a serious Catholic commentator, when he reveals exclusively that Archbishop Tartaglia of Glasgow is overweight.

Damian is no stranger to religious controversy; for example, he was the first to break the news that Bishop Roche had put on weight. A mere three years later Arthur Roche was forced to flee Leeds and take sanctuary in Rome.

Archbishop Bunter

A future archbishop brushes up his Latin.

Meanwhile leading Catholics are hastily dieting and making sure their hairstyles are totally sensible, as they quake in fear, wondering where the "blood-crazed ferret" will bite next.

Meddling Monk

Meddling Monk - coffee fit for a Catholic

Finally, on Father Yuletide's blog, the great Fr Y explains that St Arbuck, normally regarded as the patron saint of coffee, was a distinctly dodgy character. He encourages us to buy "Meddling Monk" coffee instead.

Saint Bean

St Bean (drinking wine not coffee). Founder of Meddling Monk coffee.

Meddling Monk coffee is made by traditional methods, and is guaranteed not to damage your soul.


  1. darling eccles, you are so informative - who would ever have thought that the 'Tablet' had anything to do with Christianity at all. My brother in law says it reads like the Church Times from 40 years ago - but without the respect for the Pope xx Jess

  2. That is a very flattering picture of the POpe on the poster. He doesnt look a day over 40. Perhaps lord bannside could send him a copy as a nice gesture. I love photoshop.

  3. You don't scare me, I was taught by nunz.18 September 2012 at 08:42

    Archbishop Tartaglia is not fat.

    He is phat.

    Know thyself thy differencez. Innit.