Annoying people to be banned

Theresa May, the Home Secretary, is proposing to introduce legislation to ban annoyance, with the implementation of orders known as IPNAs (Injunctions to Prevent Nuisance and Annoyance).

This sort of irritating nuisance will probably be banned from our streets.

Naturally, we give Mrs May our full support here, as we find many things irritating. Following W.S. Gilbert with his little list, including:

There’s the pestilential nuisances who write for autographs –
All people who have flabby hands and irritating laughs – 

we have even attempted to make our own list, which included:

There are atheists like Dawkins who is nothing but a clown
For his books contain the biggest heap of garbage written down -

Yes, yes, yes, we must keep them all off the streets!

Even Damian Thompson (seen here with Fr Jorge Bergoglio receiving a cake from Mrs Gladys Mills) can be very irritating.

The important thing from now on is that everyone must be happy, and nobody must be irritated. Are you angry because your train is late? Well, now you will be able to put the managing director of Late Western in prison!

This being a mostly-religious blog, we are naturally delighted that the law will now enable us to dispose of our enemies in a state-sanctioned way - for we must not expect religious groups to have any exemptions! What is your particular hatred? Latin Masses? Paul Inwood? Carol Singers? The National Secular Society? Ban them!

Irritated by a liturgical tango? Tell Theresa!

Then again, wearing red noses in public is an established Catholic tradition, dating back to the encyclical De Nasis Rubris of Pope Pius XII, but some people do find it irritating, and Mrs May's law will make it illegal if anyone objects.

No longer shall we be seeing red-nosed popes!

So, what's not to like? All the irritating people will be driven off our streets - cyclists, motorists, pedestrians - and all the irritating newspapers - Guardian, Daily Mail, Babes in Custard - will be banned from sale. Surely, the great Theresa is onto a winner here!

And don't even think of participating in any demonstrations!