*Non-experts may not have realised that cardinals come in three flavours. The six cardinal-bishops have titular dioceses, the 200-odd cardinal-priests have titular churches, and the handful of cardinal-deacons make do with titular sheds. But we digress.
At 11 a.m. today people fell silent all round the country, as they remembered some of the achievements of Vincent Nichols; many were wearing little red flowers in honour of the cardinal. To celebrate his anniversary we re-post some pictures celebrating his finest moments.
Vincent Nichols finally gets the coveted "red shirt" of a cardinal.
It is a little-known fact that Vincent Nichols was the 13th incarnation of Doctor Who. Here he is shown confronting the forces of darkness, in the form of the Weeping Angels.
Not on the side of the angels. Not this time.
The cardinal tells us that he is very interested in "accompaniment", "walking with", "reverential listening" and "discernment". Here we see him explaining these concepts to a young admirer.
"Now, Damian, let me teach you about discernment."
But the life of a cardinal is not all a matter of rewriting Catholic teaching to suit the mood of the Tablet. There's fun and games too! Here we see our hero doing a rather inept "rabbit ears" on Archbishop Rowan Williams.
Accompaniment...
And it's not only Anglicans who receive spiritual nourishment at the hands of the cardinal...
"Reverential listening..."
Moreover, as we approach the year of Mercy, we should not forget Vin's welcome to all, in particular his persistent encouragement of "gay masses".
"Walking with..."
So let the celebrations begin! Tomorrow, to mark the 70th birthday of Cardinal Nichols, the Bank of England will issue a "Vin" £5-note.
As Americans know, there are 20 Nichols to the dollar.
So Happy Birthday to the man of whom people are already speaking in hushed tones as the future Pope Francis II. Unfortunately, this is not a joke.
I've sent the Cardinal a beautiful but insubstantial sponge cake with icing in seven different colours on the top, starting with red and ending with violet. I wonder if he'll discern the message......or maybe he'll like it soooo much that he'll try and wear it.
ReplyDeleteHello.He spouts heresy every time he opens his mouth-just like his hero Bergoglio!!
ReplyDeleteVincent Nichols turns..... (Prize for correct answer)
ReplyDeletea) .....my stomach
b) .....the other cheek
c)......tail and runs
d) .....into a Catholic
e) .....the screw on traddies
f) ..... the cathedral into a gay nightclub
g) .....up the heat on traddies
h) .....out for Liverpool
i) ......a new leaf (hurrah)
j).......water into wine
k) .....out to be an Anglican mole
l) ......around English Church, millions join
m) ....to ACTA for theology lessons
n)......in his red hat (claims to be unworthy)
.....to stone at ancient Biblical site
ReplyDelete.....to Elton for advice on sexual ethics
More suggestions please!
.....turtle and lets his tummy be tickled by The World.
Delete.....the air blue after hearing the 'Archbishop' of Canterbury has no immediate intention of stepping down.
.....in prayer to Our Lady for guidance on how a Cardinal should shepherd his flock.
(And yes, I am fully aware that, at least for the present, one of the above appears highly unlikely.)
It was inevitable his age would catch up with his IQ.
ReplyDeleteWhat the H--- kind of mitre is that? I'm sorry but I had a SNAKE in my cutlery drawer today (I live in Florida where this is a natural occurrence along with bugs and alligators and spiders) and I had to actually drink 2 Bloody Marys 2 calm me down. So I send the snake to whoever that is in the rainbow mitre.
ReplyDeleteTo be fair, I should say that 3 of these pictures are edited slightly.
DeleteWhich 3?? Really doesn't matter much, does it - one is as bad as another!
DeleteI have to confess that the Dr Who picture, the £5 note and the rainbow mitre are a little edited. The others are genuine.
DeleteSusan,
DeleteI don't know how to break this to you or if I even should at all but here goes anyway.....
It's been announced today on Cardinal Vincent's Official Website (www.vinnyforpope.com) that his next major Diocesan 'Pilgrimage' will in fact be to the Sunshine State.
I suspect it's because he's been told of that region there called the Evergays.
The trouble with blogs such as your estimable example, EOTT, or Ignatius, is that in the present circumstances they are finding it increasingly difficult to produce satirical posts far-fetched enough not to be taken seriously. The rainbow mitre is one such. I wouldn't even be surprised if somewhere in Westminster, a loyal Nicholsian acolyte is running up just such a....garment? accessory? titfer?
DeleteBruv, I think you're wrong about one of your pictures having been prestidigitationally enhanced. You see, I bought four copies* of Walter Kasper's latest book (Mercy Mercy Me - Mercy Ain't What It Used To Be) in the Westminster Cathedral Gift Shop earlier today and received a Vinny £5 as part of my change. It is legal tender, isn't it?? If I've been done, I'm tempted to go back there and challenge them but I'm scared that the assistant might then query the £75 note that I used to pay for my purchases....
Delete* to add to my mulch.
.....into a toad. Oh, wait!
ReplyDeleteI'm disappointed he's not at least 5 years older - though Francis probably wouldn't let him retire anyway.
ReplyDeleteLet's wait another five years before we do any celebrating. But will his replacement be any better? Or, even worse? To go by Francis's recent appointments in Chicago and Brussels, it could be even worse if Francis gets to appoint Vinnie's replacement.
ReplyDeleteIt is rumoured that this is a rare sighting of Cardinal Subdeacon with his Titular Umbrella, correctly attending a future Pontiff
ReplyDeletehttp://wpmedia.o.canada.com/2013/03/45.jpg?w=680&h=452
I wondered if the mitre had been edited, but here in the land of the Evergays even palm trees are decorated in rainbow cloth from the ground to the fronds for gay pride week...and lesbian family week,,,and Disney Gay Days,,,and Bear Week, and transvestite shows, drag royalty (kings and queens) shows...the Miss Gay Days contest (a "man" in drag) etc...so I figured that things might be rainbow style in England also.
ReplyDeleteOf course I haven't a clue most of the time about what's on this blog but ever since Eccles told about the synod stabbings (that was hysterical!) I've been hooked. I could never be as funny/satirical as all of you, so I just say what I have to say. And...I'm thankful that so far I haven't been banned.
Do you live in the city which still dares to call itself St Francis??
DeleteLynda,
DeleteSusan lives in the Sunshine State (Florida) as opposed to the Golden State (California). The best state in the Union though is Missouri as judging by its nickname it was discovered by St. Thomas the Apostle which isn't a bad foundation stone.
"discovered by St. Thomas the Apostle"
DeleteHmm, I doubt that...
Whilst caught up in all the excitement of his burfday, I almost missed the fact that the man himself is Cardinal-Priest of a church bearing the name of St.Alphonsus Liguori. Compare and contrast. COMPARE AND CONTRAST!
ReplyDeleteYeah, I figured (just barely) to which pictures your artistic licence had been applied - but they're just as believable as the untouched ones!
ReplyDelete......Catechism into doorstop.
ReplyDelete.....Cardinals Wiseman, Manning, Vaughan etc,etc in their graves.
DeleteVinnie must be adept at turning if he's scored 70 of them by now. Wouldn't that make him a bit dizzy at his age?
ReplyDeleteHe might not be your idea of a cardinal but you gotta admit, he certainly put the "tit" in titular.
ReplyDeleteThat Archbishop Rowan Atkinson is a bit of a comedian isn't he? Him and Cardinal Jack Nichols (thought it was Nicholson) doing that miming with those white gloves ... bit of a French turn.
ReplyDelete.... wine into water was another odd turn.
Dear Eccles,
ReplyDeleteYou have wonderful gifts. Please don`t use them in this way. If you`re totally fed up with our Cardinal please hit the prayer button and not the mock button. Same goes for your combox contributors. For heaven`s sake guys, you`re not in the 6th form common room: there`s a spiritual war on. Grow up and fight in it, and stop the uncharitable sniggering.
You mean ... it's not the 6th form common room?... but I thoug.......
Delete