Tuesday, 31 December 2019

The refugee Pope

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A Christmas appeal. At this time of year, our thoughts naturally turn to the plight of refugees, and I want to highlight the case of Jorge...
2 comments:
Tuesday, 24 December 2019

The Advent Calendar

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So, finally, we reach day 24 of Advent, and all the little windows on my spiritually nourishing Advent calendar have been opened. We see he...
9 comments:
Monday, 23 December 2019

Has Francis been replaced by an android?

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Various theories have been advanced about the mysterious device seen attached to Pope Francis, as observed on Marco Tosatti's lovely b...
5 comments:
Sunday, 22 December 2019

Pope Francis addresses the Curia

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Dear brothers and sisters, Start with something friendly. Usually you insult them for twenty minutes without a break, and it doesn't go...
7 comments:
Saturday, 21 December 2019

How to worship a life-jacket

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We continue our series on "How to be a good Pope" with more advice for any of our readers who may at some stage be invited to give...
10 comments:
Friday, 20 December 2019

Harry Potter and the Curse of Woke

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All royalties to be divided equally with J.K. Rowling. "Harry (he him), have you met the new pupil, Doris Trans?" asked Hermione...
5 comments:
Monday, 16 December 2019

Fr James Martin tries Conversion Therapy

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The subject of "Conversion Therapy" or "Reparative Therapy" is controversial, and according to that top papal adviser ...
5 comments:
Saturday, 14 December 2019

Brexodus 20 - Bosis smiteth the Corbynites

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Continued from Chapter 19. 1. Thus in the seventh month Bosis became the leader of the Conservatites, and was charged with leading the c...
5 comments:
Sunday, 8 December 2019

Destruction of the idol Pachabanana

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Allies of Pope Francis have been reacting furiously to the news that an art work, "Pachabanana", consisting of a banana taped to ...
10 comments:
Thursday, 5 December 2019

The sex life of the Jesuit

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We are grateful to Fr James Martin for drawing our attention to a survey which claims that "...same-sex behaviour is bound up in the n...
12 comments:
Wednesday, 4 December 2019

No more old Catholics to be canonized

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A decision has come down from the Vatican that only Catholics inspired by the Spirit of Vatican II will henceforth be eligible for canoniz...
2 comments:
Monday, 2 December 2019

Pope says that sad people are not Christians

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Pope Francis has declared that sad people are not Christians , so let's all be cheerful, guys, and we'll be saved! Someone (I can...
10 comments:
Thursday, 28 November 2019

ASK FATHER: I utterly reject the Church so how can I remain Pope?

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From a reader (J.B.): QUAERITUR: The Catholic Church is really getting me down. There are so many people who spurn my new initiatives (ab...
5 comments:
Wednesday, 27 November 2019

"Possession of giant killer bees is sinful," says Pope

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Following Pope Francis's comments that the possession of nuclear missiles is sinful, Catholics have rushed to destroy any that they migh...
2 comments:
Saturday, 23 November 2019

Justin Welby explains buffer zones

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"Hi! I'm Justin, Archbishop of Canterbury, and the rightful heir of St Peter (we try not to mention Henry VIII). I've been aske...
5 comments:
Tuesday, 19 November 2019

Chick-fil-A starts donating to the Catholic Church

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Following pressure from LGBT activists, who have forced their first ever British restaurant (in Reading) to close, Chick-fil-A have surrend...
5 comments:
Saturday, 16 November 2019

New eco-friendly catechism

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Plastic 92357 Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents the use of plastic as an act of grave depravity, tradition has alw...
7 comments:
Friday, 15 November 2019

Fr James Martin explains the Bible

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Followers of Fr James Martin LGBTSJ have long admired his interpretations of the Bible ("Mary Magdalene was the Church", "Jes...
6 comments: