De Queen forgot to fill in de date, I expect she was too busy.
"Eccles, we is goin out for a cellebratoin, and I is gonna show you de best Austrialan ciusine," said my dere Anti. So she booked us a table at de leadin Pottymouth restaurant, "Maisson Boomerang," so called because your food usaully comes back again a few hours later.
Anti Moly had a luvly twelve-course meal of kangaroo suop, fried oppossum, wallabby stew, roast wombat, koalla bear pie, emu curry, haddock, crockodile, giant barracuda and many other dellicacies washed down wiv gallons of gin. For me she chose de "bush ticker" optoin, of live witchetty grubbs, spiders, weevils, mouse tales, etc. washed down wiv staggnant water fresh from de billaboing. She spoils me, she really does, and it makes up for de dog food and bons dat she gave me when I first got here.
Den we sang tradditoinal Austrialan songs, like "Waltzin MacKillop," "Tie me sockpuppets down, sport," and "De Cradinal wot loved me" (dat's a new one I didn't know) until dey frew us out into de street.
After dis grate feast we is both feelin a little ill, I cant fink why.
Judy Collyer, otherwise known as Judy8 / Alfred Haddock / Molybdenite recently retired from her job as Admissions Manager at Griffith English Language Institute, Griffith University. She is pictured here.
ReplyDeleteSince she has been part of an aggressive stalking campaign and together with others searching the internet for anything she could find about me, I have no hesitation in returning the compliment.
She is also part of an atheist trolling group called 'Flamethrowers'. There is a lot more still to come. Several of us have been working on this. http://www.hothousemedia.com/ltm/ltmbackissues/aug07web/aug07agencynews.pdf
Um, I doesnt know what to say here, but in de immotral words of St Cuttley, "I is so glad you has set de record straihgt."
DeleteAfter a meal of fried oppossum washed down by gin, I'm not surprised that she is a flamethrower.
ReplyDeletePerhapps I needs to write a blogg about Anti's activvities in de Flamefrowers gruop.
DeleteDear Eccles, I hope you don't mind me adding this as a comment. It was muddlerated off Damain's blog. With best wishes, Puddleglum.
ReplyDeleteThe secret diary of Will Heaven (age 12).
Today I have been promoted to Acting Telegraph blogs editor, while Uncle Damian is finishing his book about addiction. Mum says that soon they will promote me even further, and I will become a moderator! Decided to celebrate my new-found power by writing a third consecutive article about Downside. Also made a rude noise when James Delingpole walked past.
I had been working in my new role for about an hour when Damian telephone. "Are they missing me?" he asked. "What do you mean, they haven't even noticed I've gone? I'm not one of those unread people like Judith Potts and Ian Cowie, who people can't identify. Do they write about cooking or snooker scandals, I can't remember? No, I was once, in 1995, called a blood-crazed ferret by the Church Times."
I explained to Damian that he wasn't even the most interesting person on his own blog, and that Eccles, Bellator and even Dax were considered to be more controversial posters. He sobbed quietly and put the receiver down.
(To be edited by a moderator)
Ullo, bruvver Puddles, and fank you for dis valluable literrary contributoin.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteBosco, dere bruvver, it is great dat you shows so much affectoin for our Anti Moly, but I has to keep dis blogg siutable for a fambly readership. We is all missin you now dat you has jioned a convent. Luv, Eccles.
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