This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Thursday, 8 August 2013

They're changing popes at Vatican Palace

With apologies to A.A. Milne.

Vatican Palace

They're changing popes at Vatican Palace -
   Christopher Robin went down with Alice.
Francis is washing a Muslim girl's feet -
"That is going to go down a treat,"
   Says Alice.

They're changing popes at Vatican Palace -
   The new pope needs no cooks or valets.
A grand apartment he wants to decline -
"That cupboard under the stairs is fine,"
   Says Alice.
cupboard under the stairs

An apartment fit for a pope!

They're changing popes at Vatican Palace -
   Dawkins shows his usual malice.
We saw a concert: the pope stayed away -
"I think he's busy with 'pope things' today,"
  Says Alice.

They're changing popes at Vatican Palace -
   We hear of scandals worse than in Dallas.
They told me of a naughty old vicar -
"That surely can't be Monsignor Ricca?"
   Says Alice.
Monsignor Ricca

I must do something about you - and let go of my ear!

They're changing popes at Vatican Palace -
   We've plastic cups, instead of a chalice.
A bunch of bishops broke into a dance -
"Vin will do likewise when he gets a chance!"
   Says Alice.
Vin doing hokey-cokey

Both arms in, and shake 'em all about...

They're changing popes at Vatican Palace -
   Rock music's in: out goes Thomas Tallis.
Pepinster's telling the pope what to do - 
"That loopy old woman hasn't a clue,"
   Says Alice.

They're changing popes at Vatican Palace -
   Christopher Robin went down with Alice.
"Do you approve of Pope Francis's style?" 
"Not always - but still he's got a nice smile,"
   Says Alice.     
pope and dove

Alternative words are permitted, replacing "Christopher Robin" by "Cardinal Cormac", "Father John Zuhlsdorf", "Damian Thompson", or the name of some other religious figure.

7 comments:

  1. They're changing popes at Vatican Palace -
    Erm! Bendict, Frances...John, Brad , Alex.
    On the altar, chalice replaced by a ball;
    " 'll the next one be Petrus Romanus or Paul?"
    Asks Alice.

    ReplyDelete
  2. By complete coincidence (and not because Rabit is really Eccles) there is an AA Milne theme to the donkey blogpost today. The Eeyore song, "Nobody wants to be my friend", especially for the hundreds of lost Twits who are arriving on the donkey blog: bewildered refugees from some obscure South London Twitter war. Bless.

    ReplyDelete
  3. PS Eccles, stick the link in, if you want: http://brotherlapin.wordpress.com/2013/08/08/welcome-to-the-lost-twitterers

    ReplyDelete
  4. wot's it all about Alice.... I mean Alfie... Someone explain the reasons for the 'Twitter War'! Or is it a skirmish?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I aint involved in any war, sister wupples, I is just spreadin good will wherever I goes.

      Delete
    2. My Rabit Theory, which is a theory entirely worked out by a rabit, is that it is neither a war nor a skrimish, but more of a Twirling dervish. It involves just one person in a strange mystical spiral of bewilderment but it looks like a whole lot of people got drawn into his headspace.

      Delete
  5. They're changing Popes at Vatican Palace
    From one taught in German to one thinks in Spanish
    There'll be nothing but LIO as never was seen
    Till there's one thinks in English like our good dear Queen
    Says Alice

    ReplyDelete