This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Saturday, 4 December 2021

The Book of Covidicus 21: the Omicron cometh

Continued from Chapter 20.

1. It came to pass that Bo-sis lost confidence in his advisers, be they the wise Sages, Neil, son of Ferguson, or even Sajidiah the bald.

2. Thus he went to visit the wise woman Pepperoni, blessed with a face like a hairdryer, who, as many cruel men said, came from a tribe of swine.

Peppa Pig

The wise woman Pepperoni.

3. And Bo-sis came back in great excitement, telling all the world that Pepperoni was most wondrous wise, and that he had learned a lot from her.

4. But what he had learned no man shall never know, for soon afterwards there came another deadly form of the plague.

5. This one was named Omicron although it should have more properly have been named after Xi-who-must-be-obeyed, the Emperor of China.

Xi Jinping

Xi-who-must-be-obeyed (pronouns Xi/Xer).

6. And this plague was the most deadly of all, as it had no effects whatsoever.

7. So Bo-sis spake out, saying, "If thou feelest healthy, then most probably thou hast caught the new plague, and should retire to thy bed for a month."

8. "For otherwise thou mayst infect thy neighbour, and he too will feel healthy."

9. And the people replied, "Now, that is the kind of plague that I like!"

10. Still, to be on the safe side, Bo-sis decreed that all men should once more cover their faces in the markets and also in the chariots known as public transport.

Baby Boris

Bo-sis discovereth a strange side-effect of the latest vixen.

11. However, for the moment, he did not insist that all the world should be vaxed.

12. For in foreign countries, such as the southern land known as Australis where men tied down kangaroos for sport, those who refused the seventh vixen were cast into the camps of concentration and left to starve.

13. Thus proving that the death rate among the unvaxed could be very high.

Continued in Chapter 22.

5 comments:

  1. FiatLuxGenesis reiterated once more that the only Greek letters that mattered were "Alpha and Omega" as her job was determined to torment her until she received the lethal injection.

    My uncle in the meanwhile continued to battle COVID in the hospital as well as vaccine mandates for the sake of his grandchildren who declared him a hero, fighting against the tyranny. My parents insisted he was unvaxxed though no evidence of an hostility against these vaccines was actually ever discovered on his FB timeline.

    I continued to go maskless in public as the myriads assumed I was vaxxed. Perhaps I was?

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    Replies
    1. Speaking of FiatLuxGenesis, anyone seeing this, especially BruvverEccles, please tell her I'm praying for her.

      Delete
  2. The baby picture is quite special! He could be Boris Jr, even if he's not. You've got a talent for finding those photos. And Peppa Pig! I can just hear the snort in her Papa's voice.

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  3. Of the abuse of minors, the Pachapapa had to say :

    "A historical situation must be interpreted with hermeneutics of the time, not of now. For example slavery, today we say it is brutality but once there was another hermeneutic."

    Good jolly old Relativism !!

    Good jolly old hermeneutics of rupture !!

    Good jolly old moral failures !!

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  4. As to accepting the resignation of the Archbishop of Paris, quite apart from the extremely snide reporting of gossip about what the man had done wrong (which is directly contrary to the Catechism and the Commandment) :

    "This is why I accepted Aupetit’s renunciation: not on the altar of truth, on the altar of hypocrisy "

    ReplyDelete