This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Monday 15 October 2018

Your 32 worst hymns

On to Round 2 of the World Cup of Bad Hymns, beginning on Tuesday 16th October. Now 32 examples of the poets' art remain, out of 64 originally, and there are eight groups of four from each of which two go through to the final 16.

Congratulations to Dan Schutte on getting three wonderfully appalling hymns through to the second round; Brian Howard, Estelle White and Marty Haugen are also going well.

hymn with guitar

All join in the singing, please.

Although officially neutral, I was disappointed that we lost "I watch the sunrise", "Colours of Day", "Enemy of apathy", "Our God reigns" and above all "Follow me" (the two shirts song), since this probably means that Fr Arfur will feel that it's OK to carry on using them at the church of St Daryl the Apostate. Oh well...

Title Author Rd 1 Rd 2
God's Spirit is in my heart Alan Dale 2 1
Kumbayah anon 10 6
Christ be our light Bernadette Farrell 13 8
Bind us together, Lord Bob Gillman 15 7
If I were a butterfly Brian Howard 5 3
I just wanna be a sheep Brian Howard 14 8
Walk in the Light Damian Lundy 3 1
I, the Lord of sea and sky Daniel Schutte 1 1
Let us build the city of God Daniel Schutte 7 3
Come to the table of plenty Daniel Schutte 16 7
Sing a new Church Delores Dufner 6 4
Moses, I know you're the man Estelle White 14 7
Cheep! said the sparrow on the chimney top Estelle White 16 8
Shine, Jesus, shine Graham Kendrick 10 5
This little light of mine Harry Dixon Loes 4 1
I am the Living Bread Ifeanyichukwu Eze 7 4
Eat this bread Jacques Berthier 11 5
One bread, one body John Foley 12 5
Gift of finest wheat John Michael Talbot 1 2
Gloria (clap clap) Martin Anderson 12 6
As the deer pants Martin Nystrom 11 6
Let us build a house where love can dwell / All are welcome Marty Haugen 5 4
Gather us in Marty Haugen 6 3
Who is the alien Mary Louise Bringle 9 5
The world is full of smelly feet Michael Forster 8 3
On eagle's wings Michael Joncas 4 2
Alleluia Ch-Ch Paul Inwood 15 8
They'll know we are Christians by our love Peter Scholtes 8 4
Jesus Christ the apple tree R.H. 9 6
Lord of the Dance Sidney Carter 2 2
Go, the Mass is ended Sister Marie Lydia Pereira 3 2
I am the Bread of Life Suzanne Toolan 13 7

man in pain

Get voting!

12 comments:

  1. I know (and loathe) 19 of the 32 finalists. And having read your list, I am now enduring the mother of all earworms...

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  2. Amazed that nothing by John Bell & Graham Maule has got through

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    Replies
    1. Nothing by John Bell & his boyfriend Graham Maule should be on a list of rubbish Catholic hymns. Mr Bell is a minister of the Presbyterian Church of Scotland, as you probably know.
      He was student Rector of the University of Glasgow in the early eighties, when I was a student there. To say he was a hippie would be being polite. His music is unplayable.

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    2. They're not specifically Catholic hymns. Several of them are hated by Catholics, Anglicans and Lutherans alike (and anyone can vote). Three Bell/Maule efforts were eliminated in Round 1.

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  3. Ray Repp’s failure to qualify for the tournament at all demonstrates how quickly the trailblazers get overtaken by their followers.

    No one in the tournament would have had a career if Repp hadn’t been blasting away with Mass for Young Americans and Allelu! back in 1964-65, yet he was all but forgotten ten years later.

    I would suggest calling the prize the Ray Repp Trophy as a reminder of who went before them all.

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    Replies
    1. Ray Repp was in the 64, with "Here we are, all together, as we sing our song, joyfully" but he seems to have been voted out.

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    2. There was a Fr. Faber in the 64, too. Its failure to catch the votes should give hope to the Whites, Inwoods and Repps of this world - if only it hangs around for long enough even the most execrable doggerel will come to be treasured.

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  4. Spooky. I got 19, too. Forgot to suggest ‘Drop-kick me , Jesus, through the goal-posts of life’ for the qualifying round. Message to Sarto 2012. I endured Bell & Maule ditties at my Catholic parish before defecting to what is now an Oratory in formation.

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  5. Many of the above I do not know. Those in your list that I do know make me want to puke! I am a sensitive soul!

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  6. I'm embarrassed to admit I sung these back in the day. I did not like many of them however, and could never understand why the very old hymns were rarely sung when they were much more authentic sounding and pleasing to the ear. But then again, I didn't get the connection between these choices and our obviously flaming organists. I thought that was just a coincidence.

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  7. Jesus said
    "what you do unto the least of my brethren you do unto me"
    Inflicting this torture on souls trying to worship and diminishing hymns to the standard of Bill and Ben the flowerpot men will not go unnoticed when the time comes.

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