This is the spiritual journey of me, Eccles, my big brother Bosco, and my Grate-Anti Moly. Eccles is saved, but we've got real problems with Bosco and Anti.
This is me, Eccles
Thursday, 21 April 2022
Extreme Catholicism
Adapted from Katherine Denkinson's piece about Extreme Catholicism. We read it so you don't have to - you'd probably need a subscription anyway.
Jacob Rees-Mogg is a holier-than-thou [good phrase, eh?] Catholic of the extreme right. For example, his sons are named after saints! [Oops, I seem to
be named after a saint too. Let's move on.]
The Two Minutes Hate begins at 11.00.
What else does this hard-right Catholic do? Ah yes, he wishes people a Happy Christmas or a Happy Easter, in order to show
how holy he is. Nobody ever wishes ME Happy Christmas, although, taking inspiration from A.A. Milne, I do have a shelf
full of cards that I have sent myself! But I would never wish anyone Happy Easter, just in case they mistook me for a hard-right
fascist Catholic!
So stop harassing people on Twitter by posting "Happy Easter" messages!
I have reported this as a hate crime.
Then Mogg votes against LGBTQSJ marriage, which has been a traditional
way of life for the human race ever since the time of, er, the patriarch David Cameron.
He opposes abortion too. Are there no limits to this man's holier-than-thou [spits] Catholicism?
Enough, Jacob! We know that you are a Catholic, you don't have to keep telling us by actually believing any of that
stuff.
Don't give us any of St Paul's Old Testament pearl-clutching horrors! [good phrase, eh?]
Phew! Do you know what he has done now? He has disagreed with the Archbishop of Canterbury's Easter message! Justin Wobbly knows
that the true message of Easter is nothing to do with Jesus being born in a manger [memo, check what Catholics actually believe]
but can be summarised in four words: BORIS BAD, KEIR GOOD! That's why the holy man (but definitely not holier-than-thou) preached a sermon about
sending frightened refugees, fleeing the horrors of, er, France, to Rwanda rather than the Savoy hotel in London - or even the Ritz.
"If Jesus had existed he would have voted Labour."
I could go on. In fact I am a few lines short, so I'd better keep ranting.
Ah yes, he doesn't like Black Lives Matter, that harmless organization which has done so much to make its members
richer by looting and arson. Also he is part of a "War on Woke" - struggling in a hard-right manner to
resist Critical Race Theory, the decolonization of teaching (2+2=4 is RACIST), and all the rest.
I think I've said enough. Jacob Rees-Mogg is LITERALLY Torquemada, burning people who refuse to send Christmas cards in April,
and persecuting anyone who doesn't attend the Traditional Latin Mass [not sure what this is, but I think it's
something to do with being nasty to people in Latin]. Don't trust his friendly Easter greetings!!
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Those Catholics! They're not wanted anywhere, but they just keep showing up! And saying things like Merry Christmas, or Happy Easter. Maybe that post author needs to invite a few of them around for a lecture on What Not to Say (or do). Better yet, What Not to Be.
ReplyDelete'Extreme Catholicism' - extremely funny - thanks!
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