This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Wednesday, 22 July 2015

There's only one religious scandal

We've seen a few religious scandals recently, but they all have exactly the same plot. A controversial person moves into a job previously occupied by a more popular person; he does something weird, and annoys people; he eventually leaves. This plot was invented by Anthony Trollope.

Barchester Towers

We've seen it all before.

Thanks to
a change of Prime Minister,
the machinations of Cormac Murphy-O'Connor,
insufficient investigation by the Vatican,
sloppy thinking by Archbishop Peter Smith,
is stunned by the arrival of
"well, my dear, I rather believe you are right"
"self-absorbed promethean neopelagianism"
"I'm not kidding you, I actually can't remember which way I voted"
"I didn't mention his rainbow mankini, did I?"
Bishop Proudie,
Pope Francis,
Cardinal Vincent Nichols,
Fr Steven Fisher,
blocks the reappointment of Septimus Harding to Hiram's Hospital.
accepts a Bolivian artefact that glorifies Marxism.
celebrates a "Gay Mass".
drives away the lovers of the traditional Mass. 

A powerful German bishop. Or is this just a lookalike?

The faithful are further outraged by the conduct of 
Obadiah Slope,
Cardinal Kasper,
Mgr Keith Barltrop,
a certain deacon,
decides to woo Mrs Eleanor Bold.
pushes heretical doctrine on the subject of marriage. 
does not understand the Church's views on transgenderism.
sits in a shed stirring up trouble.
In the end, the new man
is forced to accept Mr Arabin as the new Dean,
retires, leaving Cardinal Pell to be elected as his successor,
gets a stiff letter from the Congregation of the Doctrine of the Faith,
resigns and goes to teach in a school,
and everyone lives happily ever after.

Mourning the departure of Fr Steven Fisher.


  1. What a summary!!!!!
    Thanks Eccles.

  2. It is entirely unacceptable to allege that a serving priest is a trollope. This is the kind of deplorable hate-filled shameful venomous reckless detraction and calumny we have come to expect from this unsuccessful blog, with your mere million hits in three days, and it is time you let ACTA just get on with the job of building sheds with Wi-Fi for clergy in minor orders.

  3. Comparison to Trollope is great, superb and wonderful blog as always!

  4. U is not religgously sclandaous -- only I is religgously sclandaous.