This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Sunday, 6 November 2011

A warnin to de unsaved

I has been committin a grave sin, Bosco says, as I has been spendin too much time tellin you about de storry of my life (de world tuor, de raid on de Cathlic riches, Farver Arfur's exercisms of Anti Moly etc.). We has gotta spend more time finkin about your Salivation, dere reader, cos you has only come here becos you wants to be as saved as Bosco and me.

In de immorttal words of Bosco, if your huose is on fire den we gotta wake you up and tell you. And if you doesnt know Jessus pussonally, den your huose will be on fire, cos we is gonna set it on fire. (Has I got dis sutble thoelogical point rihgt, Bosco? Cuold you explane it again some time?)

Here is a pitcher of Bosco commin to de aid of some poeple wot has got a huose on fire. De kid wot is drivin lent us de fire engin, so we let her drive. In fact she drives much better dan Bosco, who allways speeds up when he sees nuns crossin de road ahead, who can blame him?

Fireman Bosco

Cosstume hollymen is anuvver obstackle to being saved, and I fuond some more of dese dreddful creechers in a TV dockumentery called All Gas and Gators, dey is worshippin someone called Saint Ogg. I was told dat dey isnt Cathlics, but dey is clearly not saved. Note dat in de photto it aint de Bibble dey is readin, probabbly it is a relick of St Ogg, which de guy in de top hat is gonna kiss. Dat's not de way saved poeple like Bosco and me behaves.

More cosstume holly men

Finally, we gotta warn you about a Woman wiv de Gold Cup wot appears in de Book of Relevation, and definitley aint saved. I managed to find a pitcher of dis wicked pusson, so Bosco and me knows our ennemy. We has contactted a dettective agenncy to see if dey can track her down, den we can save her.

Woman wiv gold cup

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