"I owe it all to reading the Eccles blog."
Says one convert, "I feel that the Catholic Church is truly united behind Pope Francis at present. There is a general sense of well-being. He has solved the problems of China, by allowing them to appoint their own bishops, and probably the next Pope as well. He has waved his hand and made all the sex and financial scandals vanish into thin air. He has written a document on marriage and the family, Amoris Laetitia, that everyone can agree on. He has made some brilliant appointments of cardinals, by choosing the most unlikely people! What a time to be alive!"
"I'll have the shepherd's pie, made with real shepherds." No wonder people would rather be Catholics.
Said another convert, "I like the way new Catholics are made welcome. Austen Ivereigh - surely one of the giants of Catholic journalism - has described us as neurotic, and he is spot on! Then there's Professor Doctor Doctorior Doctorissimus Massimo Faggioli, a man whose knowledge of Catholic theology since 2013 (when the subject was invented) is second to none: he has warned us against conservative converts, and quite right too. Apparently the Catholic catechism will soon contain a section explaining that we should support Marxism, and that's only fair."
"Walter Kasper is my hero. A pillar of orthodoxy and traditional teaching."
Another convert spoke of the powerful work of Father James Martin LGBTSJ in driving people into the Catholic Church. "His new book, Digging a hole, is pure genius, and explains how we should all strive to go downhill. As explained in the papal encyclicals Facilis descensus Averno and Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate, there is wide path that we can all follow, paved with good intentions, and this is the way he wants Catholics to go."
But why do people rely on social media for their spiritual nourishment? Instead, could the Catholic Church not appoint people as leaders - you know, generally-respected shepherds of the sheep, who could give guidance? We would expect such people to speak out on issues of public concern. I've even thought of a name for them - bishops!
A bishop, showing leadership.
No, there's no hope there, and so people are driven to social media for guidance.
A final word from another convert: "In the end, the most effective tool for Evangelisation is surely the Eccles blog. Pope Francis is a regular reader of his "How to be a good pope" advice column; Peter Hitchens has never been the same since it was pointed out to him that Queen Elizabeth I martyred Catholics; Antonio Spadaro hangs on his every word. It can't be long before these three people (and many others) come out as Catholics." He's right, you know.
I have to confess I once doubted our great leader Francis, when he preferred those government of China approved bishops over the clandestine rightful ones.
ReplyDeleteBut thanks to your fine article I remembered that one rule of chess: any pawn can be made bishop, provided that it goes to the other side of the board. Very enlightening.
Like a good Catholic, I always rely heavily on my bishops when I play chess.
ReplyDeleteTricky, sometimes, when bishops are queens.
DeleteHey what a time to be alive ! Catholics are 'cool'.
ReplyDeleteI will have to get hold of a copy of the new Catechism for the new Catholicism. We have a lot to thank Pope Francis for ...dragging the outmoded traditional Catholics kicking and screaming into the modern neo culturally cool marxist era.
The new version "Catholic Catechism For The Vacuous" comes in installments with glossy pics of hirsute tattooed Jesuits I suppose.
It is always heartening watching them promote the virtues of same sex marriage on t.v
The other day a principal of a Catholic girls High School annnounced she was giving an option for the girls to wear shorts and trousers so that the transgender students would feel more comfortable.
Well done Sister Heresytamol !
I can feel myself transbotanically gendering into a
giant Catholic cactus with lethal prickles..Goodness...I hope I'm not in trouble with the Swiss guard for blocking the stairway to Heaven.
Eccles, "Youtuber" is how I address my yams and potatoes in the garden to see if they are ready to be harvested - "Youtubers ready to be dug up yet?"
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