This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Friday, 18 May 2018

Did the Pope say "Yanny" or "Laurel"?

In the immortal words of the Daily Mail, the Internet was divided this week by a recording of Pope Francis finally answering the Dubia posed by Cardinal Burke and his colleagues. Did he say "Yanny" (an ecclesial term for "Yes") or "Laurel" ("No")?

This is not the first time that people have been divided over the Holy Father's words. Did he say "Divorced and remarried Catholics can receive Communion" or did he say "No, we're not changing Church teaching, you adulterous weasels"? Nobody can be sure.

Pope and Welby

Did Francis say "Get lost you heretic" or "We all believe the same thing really"?

Then again, did he say "It's open house in the Catholic Church: of course Protestants can receive Communion, even though they don't believe in it!" or did he say "Get those Lutheran frauds out of my Church and tell them not to come back until they've converted!"?

These are difficult issues, and the SPADARO WORMTONGUETM speaking device that the Pope was given to help him make public announcements does not seem to have simplified the issue.

This is not the first time that the Internet has been "hilariously divided" (a Daily Mail term meaning "we're going to show you more of the same boring old tosh"). Remember that dress?

Women bishops, ha ha

What colour dresses are these models wearing?

In the picture above some see a group of dignified and holy women dressed for a religious ceremony. Others see a bunch of clowns posing as bishops. Which is correct? We shall never know.


  1. The pope heard yanny. I heard laurel.

  2. The pope has priors for getting the words in his sentences mixed up. If Italy ever forms a new government, it should introduce a Sin Tax to penalise the Master of Casa Santa Marta if he fails to recognise wrongdoing when it's staring him in the face. That way, the next time he invites Emma Bonino round for tiffin, instead of addressing her as one of Italy's forgotten greats, he can say to her, "It will be great when you have been completely forgotten by Italy."

    Yanny and Laurel? They sound like Vatican employees who wouldn't necessarily fit in if beamed onto a Russian trawler on a slow sail from Murmansk to Vladivostok.