This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Tuesday 14 August 2018

Marcantonio Colonna revealed to be Fr Thomas Rosica

When The Dictator Pope first came out, it was said to be authored by Marcantonio Colonna: it was not until several months later that someone realised that Mr Colonna had an alibi, as he had been dead for 400 years. Accordingly, it was then "revealed" that the author was Henry Sire, then Knight of the Order of Malta. Mr Sire suffered for this, being de-knighted.

However, that's not the end of the story, as it turns out that the true author of The Dictator Pope was Fr Thomas Rosica, the be-nighted Satan Lite media mogul and alleged Catholic priest.

Rosica's waffle

"Yes, Francis is a dictator and that is a GOOD THING."

Apologies to readers for two consecutive posts on our hero, Rosie, but he is a gift to spiritually nourishing bloggers.

Catholics tend to look down on Sola Scriptura teaching, because after all there are numerous ways to interpret certain Biblical passages, and until now it was best to interpret them in the light of tradition - that is, in the same way as the early Church did. But now we have Solus Franciscus, the view that all Catholic teaching should be torn up, and we should listen only to Pope Francis. Once you accept that, Amoris Laetitia will be your Bible, rather than, er, the Bible.

lollipope

The Great Dictator, now available badly drawn on a lollipope.

Francis's record as a dictator is not in doubt - he may have invaded the Sovereign Order of Malta, he may have made all dissidents into unpersons, he may have promoted nonentities and heretics into positions of power, his speeches reek of fanaticism, but... but... oh yes, at least he makes the trains run on time in the Vatican.

Mussolini

Habemus Papam!

Some of Fr Rosica's words are a little difficult to understand. What's all this about the Pope being free from "disordered attachments"? Does this mean the boot for his adviser, Fr James Martin SJ, as disordered an attachment as you would ever expect to see? And what is Jesuit intellectualism? Is that something to do with never making clear-cut statements, but always speaking ambiguously, so that several heretical interpretations are possible? We need to be told.

Henry Sire

Henry Sire, now believed to be a sockpuppet of Fr Rosica.

Still, the main message is clear. Previous Popes were such boring fuddy-duddies, always repeating over and over again the messages of their predecessors, of the doctors of the Church, of the apostles, of Jesus... But now the Fourth Person of the Trinity has arrived. His Coming is predicted in the Bible, "And Lo! A Fat Argentinian Dictator will come to dwell among you. And he will tell you what I should have said, but got wrong."

Somewhere in the Book of Revelation, I fancy.

14 comments:

  1. Despite close acquaintance with anti-Rosicans for about 25 years, I have never heard anyone else come up with "Satan Lite", so congrats!

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  2. Am so dull in the mornings that I didn't get the Satan Lite pun until after having read Mrs McLean's comment. Tsk.

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  3. One of your best ever! "And Lo! A Fat Argentinian Dictator..."

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  4. A little masterpiece! I laughed and enjoyed, as my hatred of heresy increased ever more. This should be weaponised.

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  5. Wot abaht dis den: Bergoglian Modernist Theology = Super-Lite on Christian/Catholic Theology? Sahnds sheer 'eresy to me, innit? EXCOMMUNICATE! EXCOMMUNICATE!!

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  6. Seriously, 'tho' -- The Fat Dic has brought the present Papacy into great disrepute with real Catholics -- but maybe not the Novus Ordo NuChurch lot 'cos after fifty years of Spirit of Vat Two nonsense they're already Protty Modernists themselves. All rather long-in-the-tooth, now, as am I. Sad what the post-Vat II hierarchy did to our lovely Church-- wicked, really. AND all the abuse so many of 'em got up to!!!!!!! Up to the Yoof now, to bring back the Church to the Holy Faith of Our Fathers. Pray for them.

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  7. Brilliant. Essential work to bring down this heretic.

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  8. Sounds like we now have the #1 witness for Bergoglio's heresy trial.

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  9. More recently Father Rosica has regaled us with an article about how we are what we eat. I think he has been at the fruitcake again.

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  10. Mmmm Mmmm Mmmm...Barack Husain Obama... Mmmm Mmmm Mmmm Pope Jorge Bergoglio...Mmmm Mmmm Mmmm....

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  11. Elsewhere in Fr. Rosica's truly inspiring and endearingly wacky article, he mentions how the pope, addressing the General Congregation of Jesuits in 2016 "departed from his text and insisted that joy “must always be accompanied by humor,” and with a big smile on his face, he remarked, “as I see it, the human attitude that is closest to divine grace is a sense of humor.”

    Taking his own good advice then, maybe he should change his official title to "Pope Francis(LOL!)"...because I know I do.

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  12. Francis: Ah, Rosica. I wanted a word about the release headed 'Francis makes it up as he goes along - ain't it just great!'.
    Rosica: Glad you're pleased Holy Father. Oww, that hurt, what's wrong with facing facts now and again? Ahhh, please don't hit me again.
    Francis: The Inuit parish you're going to has 3 Catholics but 2 of them have defected since you published the release and the other one is 'shaky'. Have a good time and cut back on the truth stuff.

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  13. Uhm... Eccles, nobody can be sure of their Salvation. You can be a Christian now and apostatize in the future and go to hell. That is why we should pray for final perseverance. So, unless this is a joke... you committed a mistake

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