This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Wednesday, 15 January 2020

Francis and Benedict agree a deal

The scene: Emeritus Pope Benedict's apartment. Benedict is sitting at a desk, putting his finishing touches to a new manuscript "From the depths of the Joy of Love", soon to appear as a collaborative venture with Cardinals Burke and Brandmüller (I wouldn't be so sure about that). Enter Archbishop Georg Gänswein, perturbed.

Benedict and Georg Gänswein

A crisis in the Vatican!

Gänswein: Holy Emeritus Father, we're in a mess here. The other Holy Father is seething with rage at your book with Cardinal Sarah. He's already slapped six pilgrims today, and he's wearing boxing gloves for his audience this morning. He says Pachamama is very angry!

Benedict: But what did we do? The book simply restates traditional Catholic teaching. Oh... I see the problem...

Gänswein: The attack poodles have been deployed. The big hitters such as Ivereigh, Beans (he's been tweeting non-stop for 48 hours, having injections of gelato to keep him going), Mickens, ... not to mention the small hitters such as Rich Raho the dunce of the class.

Sarah

"Look, it's only Rosica who takes credit for other people's work."

Benedict: What does Sarah say?

Gänswein: What can he say? He wrote some of the book, you wrote some of the book. This is what we technically call a joint work. But the Fat Controller wants you to say that Sarah was the author, and all you did was wake up and nod occasionally as he read the book out.

Benedict: Ask the guys at Ignatius Press what really happened.

Gänswein: We did. They used Ignatian discernment (following a spot of Ignatian yoga) to determine that you really are one of the authors.

Ignatian yoga

"The Ignatius Press is one of my favourite yoga positions," says papal aide-de-camp Fr Jim.

Benedict: Look, I don't care. I don't need the fame or the royalties. Imagine having to do a book tour like poor Ivereigh, where only two children and a dog turn up to each lecture, and the dog won't stop howling. I'll take my name off it, on one condition.

Gänswein: Anything...

Benedict: Tell Francis to take his name off Amoris Laetitia. It could be labelled, "By Lorenzo Baldisseri in discussion with Pope Francis."

Gänswein: That could be the deal we're looking for!

20 comments:

  1. How about both taking their names off "canonisation" of Antipope Wojtyla?

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    Replies
    1. And considering a man who prayed, not for but as good as WITH heathen and heretics as a saint is somehow supposed to be intelligent?

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    2. Kissing the Koran is kind of a no-no for a pope. First commandment breakage. And logical incompatibility with your position. And encouraging a religion which has quite material aims incompatible with the survival of... well anything else. But Antipope should not be awarded as easily, if we call JPII antipope, how do you call the... er... guy currently at the helm (I fear being slapped, so I won't utter the name)?

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    3. Well, Antipope is to me a certainty since he "canonised" Wojtyla and I fear Bergoglio could turn out (partly already begun going down that road if not reaching the stage where it is irreversible) the False Prophet.

      Btw, I don't consider him, but (provisionally) Pope Michael as at the helm ... currently since 1990.

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  2. Hey there, Georgi Guy
    Swingin’ down the street so fancy-free
    Life’s a reality, you can’t always run away

    You’re always papal hopping & swapping roles for yourself
    It’s time for jumping down from the shelf...a little bit

    Hey there, Georgi Guy
    There’s another Georgi deep inside
    Bring out all the truth you hide and oh, what a change there’d be
    The world would see a new Georgi guy
    Wake up Georgi Guy.

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    Replies
    1. Papal hopping - maybe. Have stayed with Pope Michael since 2014.

      Swapping roles for myself?

      No. Any time that you have known me is when I have identified as:

      * layman (which is the low shelf in the Church, remember - unless you mean I should for some obscure reason to public penance which is lower): neither clergy nor religious
      * writer.
      * And probably also as vagabond or beggar in Paris, I doubt you knew me my early years on internet 2001 - 2003 still in Malmö to March 2004.

      Going from street to street is not shifting roles, but keeping one, while in one street some try to "shift roles" for you from beggar and writer to non-writing beggar?

      The "other" Georgi so happens to live in this Georg. Not in analyses of what is deep inside. Especially not a stranger's.

      And its not hiding truth that's my specialty, but that of them who hide my blogs from others who might be interested.

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    2. 'Pope'Michael is a fraud. An country boy from Oklahoma had himself elected pope by his mum and a couple of relatives.
      Any one who follows him does not deserve to be on a catholic blog site

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    3. "An country boy from Oklahoma"

      A country boy, and Roman nobility is not a condition either de jure divino nor even of church law.

      "had himself elected pope by his mum and a couple of relatives."

      False narrative by substantial omissions.

      First, he tried to get a much larger emergency conclave, and therefore to have some clergy man elected which he was not, second, the six persons were three of his family, but at least Theresa Benns (who now has left his cause) would not have been a relative.

      There are Church laws about how many of a conclave must elect, but not on how many must come to the conclave.

      And the positive laws on cardinals are not de jure divino, but by positive church law, which can be dispensed in an emergency.

      One proven by Wojtyla in 1986, as also Lefèbvre concluded 1988 (St. Peter and Paul's day, Écône - also six persons present, himself, his co-consecrator Castro-Mayer, the four they consecrated, and this by an Apostolic mandate including "I hear the Popes of the past plead to me" ...).

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    4. Chestertoniann, did you put her up to it?

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  3. Celibate Pope defends celibate priesthood shock!

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    Replies
    1. Pope Michael defends married priests, while himself celibate (Father Francis Dominic is married, not under some individual dispensation, but under the now general law from Pope Michael).

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    2. "Pope Michael"? The kid from OK? Six followers including his mum....er...and Hans Georg. April 1st? Shurly shome mishtake....

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    3. See my points under Jane Perdue's poem.

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    4. Hope the Seekers don't sue me for mangled plagarism.

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  4. P. E. Benedict 'imparted his apostolic blessing' to Cardinal Sarah. What more proof do we need that he indeed is (a) Pope?

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  5. Any insightful comments from Fr. "Jim" Martin (LBTGSJ, New York model and part-time Catholic)?

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