This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Thursday, 30 October 2014

Bible to be published as a magazine

St Luke Coppen explains.

Luke and Tim

St Luke Coppen (R) with St Timothy of Margate

Following the lead of the Catholic Herald, it has been decided that from now on the Bible will be published in magazine format, rather than as a newspaper. A problem was recognised on that historic day when Christ rose from the dead, and the news came too late for our publication deadline. It's true that our website carried the news, but the regular Bible readership complained that they had to wait 50 years before they were able to read a full report in St Matthew's Gospel.

Madeleine Teahan

St Mary Madeleine Teahan: her eye-witness account of the Resurrection was delayed.

So from now on we are moving to a "magazine" format. We shall still carry news items - for example, we were first to break the news of St Peter's escape from prison - but from now on readers will see more Epistles (if we recruit St Paul Priest to the writing team, we are confident that we shall have no shortage of those). We also encourage informed speculation on religious matters, and so we have sent our special correspondent St John Zuhlsdorf off to Patmos, from which we expect some interesting Revelations in due course.

Fr Z

St John Zuhlsdorf: destined for Patmos.

Other religious papers have changed their format in recent years. It is true that the Tablet, originally edited by Moses, rather lost its way when it stopped being printed on stone, and is said to be no longer interested in God's commandments. Still, its recent Should Christians worship a Golden Calf? poll was very popular, and is said to have influenced many Catholic bishops in England and Wales.

Moses with tablets

Moses: not satisfied with the direction the Tablet has taken.


  1. Herge is also contributing the Book of Titus Tintin while St Roumph is reediting St Lucky Luke's gospel. They expect this to top the children's bestseller list.

  2. I have been asked to write an article for the magazine. It is entitled, 'What on Earth is Going on with the Catholic Herald's Online Comments Policy?'

  3. Everyone is now banned apart from Paul Priest.

  4. I have only one question. Will this make people feel more welcome?

  5. Will this be a gradual change?