"... and I have no memory of ever meeting Kieran Conry."
I am the Archbishop of Westminster; And a good Archbishop, too! You're very, very good, And be it understood, You're all splendid bishops too. We’re very, very good, And be it understood, We're all splendid bishops too. While folk shudder, "He said that?" I have got a big red hat, So I know the Pope likes me; Though my memory may fail, I know how to spin a tale And I never utter heresy! What, never? No, never! What, never? Hardly ever! Hardly ever utters heresy! Then give three cheers, and one cheer more, For the saintly Archbishop of Westminster!
"You're cohabiting with a giant rubber fish? That's really splendid. Well done!"
I do my best to sanctify you all – And with you we're quite content. You're a witless load of fools, But it's not against the rules If you sin and don't repent. We're a witless load of fools, But it's not against the rules If we sin and don't repent. Gay Masses in West One, Are surely lots of fun, They're events I'm pleased to see. Folk say Kasper should retire, But it's him that I admire, And I never welcome Tina B. – What, never? No, never! What, never? Well, hardly ever! Hardly ever welcomes Tina B. – Then give three cheers, and one cheer more, For the faithful Archbishop of Westminster!
Well... hardly ever!