Ullo Bosco, is you cross wiv your little bruvver Eccles? I is beginnin to suspect dat we has Kane and Able all over agin.
If you looks at Genessis you sees de storry of Kane and Abel. De Lord said unto dem, "You gotta write bloggs my lads and we'll see which one I likes best".
So Kane, who was de big bruvver and de leeder, he wrote a very powerfull blogg all about how he hated peeple, espeshully Cathlics, and dat he liked talkin about what peeple did in de tiolet. De little bruvver, Able, he wrote a blogg full of love and affection for his big bruvver Bosco, er I mean Kane, and tellin of his spiritaul juorney to Salivation.
Den de Lord reeds de bloggs and he says "Dats a mihgty fine blogg Kane, but I fink little bruvver Eccles, er I mean Able, has got nearer to bein saved."
Den Kane he got very wrathfull and he smote little Able. Dat means Able got deaded.
Now dis is only an old storry, and aint very rellevant todday, but I has noticed three odd things todday, Bosco dere, and I was wonderin if you could advise me.
1. Dere was a snake in my bed last nihgt and I dont remember puttin him dere.
2. I opened de cubbpoard just now to get out a saints statue to kiss, and out fell an ax what neerly hit me.
3. Dis is de strangest, some secrett admirer have given me some sweeties. I don't know dem, is dey any good?