This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Monday, 9 January 2012

How to be poppular

Anti Moly was feelin a little unhappy todday, I cuold tell by de way she burst into tears after tippin her bowl of cronflakes over me (I had forgotten to add de gin). It turns out dat she is upset cos she gets de impressoin dat she aint a poppular pusson.

"Dere is poeple on Damain's blogg who allways gits dere comments reccommended by de traddy Cathlic sockpoppet clique," she told me, "and de ones dat gets de most reccommends is de ones dat is nasty about me."

One of de poeple she is jeallous of is a chap in Spane. "He got 4 donkeys," said Anti Moly. "I is gonna outwit him by gittin 5 donkeys and writin a luvvly blogg about dem." Dis is a pitcher of Anti Moly havvin a test drive on a donkey. De poor donkey aint very happy wiv de load.

Donkeys is cool

So we decidded to go for somefink else, and Anti Moly remembered dat when she was a child she pestered her parents to give her a pet crockodile.
"But aint de savage temper and de viscous teeth gonna cuase probblems?" asked her Mom.
"Dey alreddy does," said Moly's Dad, "but I expect dat crockodiles can defend demselves against our Moly OK."

So little Moly got a pet crockodile, or maybe it was an alligattor.

Young Moly

Nowadays de viscous teeth aint a probblem, except when she leaves dem on a chair and we sits on em by mistake. Bosco used to be fond of sayin "Bite me!" until dat happenned.

So, in her old age, Anti Moly is lookin forward to gettin 4 crockodiles, and takin dem to town to help carry home de shoppin. She is gonna make videoes of dem dancin, and put dem on her blogg, as well as on Youtub. It's a pity she is too late for Chritsmas, or she could have given de crockodiles red Farver Chritsmas hats.

I gotta admitt dat red hats is a sore point wiv Anti Moly, at pressent, as Cradinal Pell is still refussin to reply to her letters and e-males, or even to admit dat he was ever sweet on her. Perhaps we can get de crocks to wear black Farver Arfur hats (dey is called berettas), so dat dey can be crockodiles in good stand-in.

So I fink dat Anti Moly has cracked de probblem of how to be a poppular pusson wiv an excitin blogg. Dis puts her in good companny wiv me, Bosco, rabit, St Cuttley (de one who writes a blogg sayin how horrid his kids is), and dem Pure Traddy Cathlics wot aint saved.

Last rights

Now we is wonderin whevver we can do somefink to make Farver Arfur poppular. Arfur is seen above givvin de last rights to someone - dis is what Cathlic cosstume holly men does to make sure dat poeple knows when de Pop wants dem to die. After Farver Arfur started readin out a list of all his worst sins, de chap in the photto said dat Death wuold come as a mercifull releese.


  1. Moly (bdenite) could record a song about her experiences. She could call it "Crocodile Rock". As an expert in Science, and English she must surely have musical experience at some point in her illustrious career. Perhaps she was one of Siouxie's banshees?

  2. Ecclies, that is a great bloguepost! I has just quite de rood blogue of de Damina Thompsoid, and contrary to idiots predilections I is not returnin. Brilliant stuff! Keep it up. You is not saved, only I is saved becuse I is not bound to de wheel of fire no longer. Only you has an anti Moly.

  3. Do I gather from what was on the DT blog that DT has given up on religion and Catholics? A shame, but seemed like it anyway. This is by far the wittiest thing to come from that blog - hope it continues xx Anon

  4. Fanks everyone for de luvvly comments. So far Anti Moly don't seem to have written much blogg abuot dem, but de crockodiles is doin just fine.

  5. I is glad that you and yore bruvver is sav'd. But I is sad that Demon Tomkins blogg can't be sav'd. A minnite's silence in memry should be observed. xx