This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Thursday 9 February 2012

Where has all de Cathlics gone?

Prince Chalres

Dat's a photto of Prince Chalres. Anti Moly is very excitted cos he and Camila is comin to Austriala as part of de celebratoins of de Jubillee. "I was hoppin for Prince Phillip, as I fink he's a charmin yuong man," she said, "but Chalres will do instead. Dis is a very thuoghtful man, and maybe he can do somefink about dem possums dat is tormentin me. Dey is keepin me awake all night, jumpin up and down on de roof, so I can't sleep, and I is obligged to stay up bloggin till dawn."

What's more she is frustratted as she cant find any more Cathlics to insullt. Dey has all gone off to an unknown destinnatoin. "Dey're hidin somewhere, I knows it!" she shouts. "Eccles, just check under de bed in case dere is a fannatical traddy clique hidin dere, will you?"

She was very cross wiv me, cos I buoght some banananas from a man in de street. For some reasons she didn't like dem.

Fair trad banananas

"Eccles, hasnt you reallised dat dem's traddy banananas, grown on de Pop's pussonal slave plantatoins, where wommen is explioted, while de missogynist men sits aruond playin cards?" she asked me. I mannaged to run out of de room before she cuold tell me it was woful.

We has had to return little Markus de boy scuot to de orphannage, so dat Anti and me can make an expeditoin to Sidney, but he is feelin very pleased wiv hisself, cos Uncle Dakwins has given him some more badges.

"Dis one is for mentoinin Spinozza on a blogg. I fuoght he was a sort of washin-machine, but Uncle Richard says he is a ratoinalist, like me, which means he is much clevverer dan dem bronze age people wot believed in sky farries," he said. "Next week I is gonna get annuvver badge if I can read a page of Bertram Russell wivvout fallin asleep."

Spinozza

Dat's a pitcher of Spinozza bein ratoinal, he's finkin hard and havvin a meltdown like Anti Moly.

Finally I has got some news of my dere bruvver Bosco. Since he posted on dis blogg sayin dat he was gonna train as a 90th degree freemasson warrlock, his studdies has been goin very well. He tells me dat he is alreddy at de 5th degree, and will soon be reddy to drink de blud of babbies, scarifice vergins, and pioson little old laddies. He has got a schollarship from de Obamma fuondatoin for his studdies - apparently Pressident Obamma is very keen on fings like dat, cos dey annoys de Cathlics.

Bosco's homework

Dat's Bosco's homework project, dey has to use up some spare parts and make somefink wiv dem. I fink it cuold be a new luv interrest for Anti Moly - frankly, I fink he's more her type dan Cradinal Pell is.

11 comments:

  1. I'm confuzzled -- which jubbly are you talking about ?

    http://www.sweetsncandy.co.uk/prodimages/lg-jubbly-orange.jpg

    or

    http://images.esellerpro.com/2486/I/256/3/lrgscalecoaster-only-fools-and-horses-lovely-jubbly.jpg

    ???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now I'm confussed too. If Prince Chalres drops in I'll try and find out what it's all abuot.

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    2. Well, I DO hope that big ears won't just disapparate before he can answer this important question about jubbly !!

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    3. I have six aminals with big eers. Shall I ask dem too? They genraly noes much abuot dese fings, bein aminals with the big eers.

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  2. Brilliant! Keep it up, darling Eccles!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hello Eccles the anonymouse. I have a theory, wot is my very own theory, wot is mine and my theory alone, and nobody else's theory. My theory - wait for it - this is my theory coming now. My theory is that the Catholics are hiding on a Google Group and they can be contacted by writing to http://yodaz.wordpress.com

    I may be wrong, but I am normally a very clever Rabit when it comes to theories about disappearing Catholics. HTH.

    Lapin

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Um, does dat mean dat my Anti Moly can "get Gogglin" and find em all?

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  4. Tell Anti Moly that the group is protected by a pair of giant oppossums, and a dangerous rabit. It is so secure that I cant sign in from my own pc without having signed in.

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  5. Dem possums sure is scary, I fink she's got a phobbia about em. Rabits too - Austrialans is allways worried about rabits.

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  6. Nice to here dat Anti Moly is missin us Cafflicks, eccles. Plees tel her dat if she go to confeshun and ses sorrie very much she mite purswade us back!

    ReplyDelete