This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Thursday, 4 April 2013

A tribute to Richard Dawkins

Last week saw the 72nd birthday of Professor Richard Dawkins, scientist, theologian and comedian; we are happy to reprint some tributes to the great man, which we found hidden away on

Custard pie

FACT: Dawkins shares his birthday with Fred Karno, inventor of the custard-pie gag.

Richard, I was a devout Catholic until the age of three, when my teddy-bear's head fell off. I prayed for it to be mended, but nothing happened. At that point I realised that God was an illusion, and that the Bible was a tissue of lies. Thank you for letting me share my pain with the world, so that no more three-year-olds suffer as I did. S. Fry.

Richard answers: Well, that sums up the whole fallacy of Christianity, doesn't it? Thank you for sharing those wise words with us.

Nancy Pelosi

Nancy Pelosi, a strong opponent of Catholic teaching, also shares Richard's birthday.

Dear Professor Dawkins, I just saw a bus go by with the message THERE'S PROBABLY NO GOD on it. Genius! I'll bet that Julian of Norwich and Thomas à Kempis never thought of that one! If only they'd known of your brilliant arguments, they'd never have wasted their lives as they did. P. Toynbee.

Richard answers: Yes, they tell me I am very good at presenting powerful slogans without any distracting attempts at justifying them!

Pierre Boulez

And Pierre Boulez, another misunderstood genius.

Dear Mr Dawkins we read the God Delusion at school, and it is so clever when it says that bringing kids up as Catholics is like child abuse. Also when you talk of sky fairies and men in dresses I see just how stupid it is to believe in God. My teacher tells me that you are a very clever man who invented genes, and so I know that what you said must be true. A. Grayling (aged 9).

Richard answers: Yes, your teacher is right, I am a very clever man. Well done.


Leonard Nimoy, another cult figure, shares Richard's birthday.

Richard, will you stop wasting your time on that dreadful egotistical website. The chicken has escaped again, and K9 needs a walk. Love, Lalla.

Richard answers: Yes, dear, of course.

William Hague

Also, William Hague, Foreign Secretary.

Infidel dog of a Dawkins, I hurl my shoes in your general direction. Unclean pig of an atheist, beware lest you suffer the death of a thousand cuts! Best regards, Abu McTavish.

Richard answers: Oh dear, have we been hacked again?


  1. Exciting prediction by well known astrologer Shelley von Strunckel (which I believe Richard reads avidly over his toast and marmalade in the Sunday Times.

    "Nobody enjoys being told what to do, especially if the manner of the individual or organisation in question is brusque or overbearing. Yet that's what you're facing. Being an Aries and ruled by the forthright planet Mars, your usual reaction would be to fight back. However, the actual ideas involved may be worth your while, it's just how things are being presented that's irritating you. Overcome your irritation with that and they'll be no problem"

    Could this be an indication that he is thinking of becoming a Catholic?

    1. Do they have toast and marmalade in the Sunday Times these days? No wonder the poor paper-boy struggles under the weight of the Sunday papers. I can see this becoming a new battleground between the Sunday titles. The problem won't be so much with the Observer's organic croissant, but rather when the Sunday Telegraph starts to include a full English. Won't somebody please think of the children?

    2. Indeed. My copy of the News of the World used to come wrapped round cod and chips. It's a great way to add value to the brand.

  2. darling eccles, does Mr Dawkins believe in birfdays, or is they another myth? xx Jess

  3. "Life results from the non-random survival of randomly varying replicators." (Dawkins) and i thought replicators were extinct.