POPE TO MARRY A MUSLIM WOMAN.
Centuries of tradition, whereby the Pope, and indeed all priests, are forbidden to marry were supposed to have been upset recently when the Pope was seen talking to an attractive Muslim lady. Said the Queen of Jordan (for it was she), "Don't be silly, Damian (who he?), we are just good friends."
FRANCIS WASHES SHEEP'S FEET ON MAUNDY THURSDAY.
The Maundy Thursday ritual of washing feet was challenged this year when it was claimed that the Pope had extended it to animals. Said a spokesman, "It is true that the Holy Father might wash the feet of a primate, but only if it were Justin Welby."
HOLY FATHER ADMITS THAT HE HAS A SON.
Despite the strong physical resemblance, it has been explained that these two popes are not related.
The rumour machine continues to grind on, with forecasts that Fr Alban McCoy would become the next bishop of Leeds (which has been sede vacante since Arthur Roche was packed off to Rome). Ten days have elapsed, and the good man still hasn't received the expected letter, so we must conclude that this bit of gossip was off the mark.
Dammit, Damian, I'm a doctor, not a bishop!
We were going to blog about St George's Day as we did last year, but apparently it has been moved, owing to a clash with Easter. Curiously, one Very Famous Person Indeed found it was possible to celebrate Easter and St George at the same time.
They always said God was an Englishman.
According to the first Epistle of Blake to the Anglo-Saxons in The New Testament we read, "And did those feet in ancient time
ReplyDeleteWalk upon England's mountains green:
And was the holy Lamb of God,
On England's pleasant pastures seen!"
Thus, objectively speaking, we may conclude by authoritative interpretation of Scripture using the historico-scientific methodology, God was definitely an Englishman (that is "was" until Tony Blair became a 'Catholic").
One is always a little 'tongue in cheek', as it were, these days when "men of the cloth" handle children.
ReplyDeleteReassuring to see men in clean white uniforms leading little lambs to the slaughter.
ReplyDeleteWhoever becomes the new bishop of Leeds I think his first priority is to weed out and quarantine the homosexuals and their sympahisers of which Leeds has more than its fair share.
ReplyDelete