This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Saturday, 18 August 2012

Pussy-footing round Wallsingham

The story so far: Eccles (saved) and Anti Moly (unsaved) has gone to Wallsingham, where my dere bruvver Bosco (very saved) is tryin to save de suols of de piglrims wot turns up.

So it was a great surprise to see Bosco drivin north out of Wallsingham wiv a great truck full of tommato ketchop.

Ketchup truck

Bosco heads for de seaside

He was headin for a place called Wells-next-de-sea, so we went and fuond our chuaffeur, Dan Hannan, and gave chase. I should mentoin dat Hannan is a great expert on Shakespeare, and he has got nicknames for all of us: he calls Bosco "Caliban," Anti Moly "Hecate," and me "Fool" (dem's cruel words, Dan). Some time I will reveel what nickname he has got for Damain Thopmson, his employer. Any geusses?

Well, we got to Wells, where Bosco was preachin to an audeince of holiday-makers, explainin dat de Rapture is at hand, and dat dey aint saved like him. By some strange miracle, which Bosco aint gonna explain, de sea had gone all red, and Bosco says dat it was turned to blood. Which is a sign, innit, Bosco dere?

Sea of blood

De North Sea has turned to blood.

Bosco says we is gonna see more signs dat de last days is at hand. I is wonderin what he means.

Anti Moly didn't like Wells, and instead showed us some snaps of de seaside at luvvly Pottymouth in Austriala, her home town. She is feelin a little homesick.

Luvvly Pottymouth

De seaside at luvvly Pottymouth

We returned to Wallsingham, and Bosco got himself into truoble. Dis time it wasnt de Cathlics but de Orfodox Church dat was de recipeints of Bosco's missionary activities. Did you know dat de Greek Orfodox church used to be a railway station?

Station of the cross

One of de stations of de cross

Bosco decided dat de Wallsingham Calumny Chappel was gonna organize a "Pusey Riot" in de Orfodox Church. I aint reely understood dis, but I looked up on Wikkipedia who Pusey was, and he was an Angliccan. Dey dont worship iddles as much as de Cathlics and Orfodox does, so maybe dey is a bit more saved.

Pusey Riot

De Calumny Chappel's Pusey Riot.

Well, dis is likely to lead to all sorts of truobles, as churches doesnt like you goin outside de bounds of de litturgy. I remember once Damain Thopmson took us to a Lattin Mass and we had to say "Lavabis me, et super nivem dealbabor." I fuoght it meant somefink like "I is washed in de blood of de Labm," but no, it means "Frow holly water over me, Farver." Bosco weren't too pleased at bein soaked, and he struck back.

Fr Prescott

Lavabis te, Fr Prescott

Anyway, never mind de remminiscences, I fink dis Pusey Riot of Bosco's is goin to have severe reppercussions.

10 comments:

  1. Darling Eccles, what larks -do you think washing Bosco in the blood of the might help solve global warming. Mind you, it is jolly hot here xx Jess

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you is hot, Jessica, dat may be annuvver mirackle of Bosco's.

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    2. Darling Eccles, it could be so, for we went many months without sunshine. I hope he didn't do any of that slaughtering of fatted calves xx Jess

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  2. Eccles, you sick little monkey, i wouldnt want to be you on judgment day, the way you mock salvation.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dem's creul words, Bruvver Bosco. Remember dat you has got a plank in your eye, and we needs to get de doctor to see to it.

      Delete
  3. I found a better picture of bozo's savd-pussyn riot :

    http://images.regretsy.com/mask5.jpg

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thats nice Jabba. Now get back to your religion of bull dagger nuns and pedophile priests and bow low to those graven images

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  4. NASA are looking for Bosco because they are planning another unmanned mission to Mars, and his CV is perfect.

    (the chimps are refusing to go with him, on hygiene grounds)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yoda, you too? You must be catholic. To gang up on me with that sick little monkey and attack the only person you know that tells you the good news of Christs work on the cross. You hate the good news. You need to ask for salvation. leave those kiddy fiddler catholic priests to themselves. Unless you like perverse priests. Which might be my guess. Now get back on yor knees to some idol

    ReplyDelete