This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Tuesday 21 May 2013

Pope's new exorcise video

It is generally agreed that exorcism of demons is best performed by senior clergy. In the Catholic church it requires a bishop's permission - otherwise priests and deacons have been known to get carried away, attempting to expel demons from cats, rice puddings and bicycles. So it should come as no surprise that Pope Francis has been seen engaging in the practice of exorcism.

exorcism

I command the spirit of Hans Küng to quit this child!

For dealing with those who are only slightly possessed, Pope Francis has invented an alternative ritual.

Pope and Merkel

So, demon, if I win at scissors-paper-stone, you agree to leave this woman alone?

For highly-connected people, Pope Francis has been known to attempt exorcisms on demand.

Pope and Biden

So, Miss Biden, how long do you think that your brother has been possessed by demons?

Of course, Pope Francis is not the first to practice exorcism. Pope Benedict XVI also had to confront the evil done by demons who attacked Christianity.

Pope in pentagram

When dealing with the worst demons, Pope Benedict always stood safely inside a pentagram.

8 comments:

  1. Thank you for your great advice about how to deal with these swivel-eyed demons, Eccles.

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  2. Since demonically possessed donkeys are now dragging invalids from their mobility scooters and eating them - as reported in the press yesterday - would it be advisable to feed my donkeys while standing in the Pentagon?

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  3. Since demonically possessed donkeys are now dragging invalids from their mobility scooters and eating them - as reported in the press yesterday - would it be advisable to feed my donkeys while standing in the Pentagon?

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  4. Darling eccles, are these demons related to the demonite couple in Farver Z's blogg? Xx Jess

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  5. Press ups are good exorcise.

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  6. He denies taking any exorcise. It was a legerte-de-main. It was a complete press-up by the journalist.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-22616792

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  7. Apparently, Mrs Biden replied that ole' Joey is possessed by a very powerful demon called POTUS

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  8. As resident witch, I would like to point out that the lines in the picture are not in fact a pentagon, pentagram or pentacle. In fact, the Pope's cat (out of view on the chair) was playing with a ball of wool.

    As any fule no, it is a tradition dating back to the day when Cherie Blair appeared in a white mantilla, that the Pope wears a chainmail vest of miraculous medals under a full set of garlic-impregnated scapulars, when meeting members of the British political classes.

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