This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Sunday, 27 November 2016

Pope attacks distinguished cardinal

Somewhere near the Mediterranean, 63 AD.

Controversial Pope Petrus has savagely attacked Cardinal Paulus in his latest Apostolic Letter, called simply 43 Francis 2 Peter. In chapter 3 of this letter he writes as follows:

2 Peter 3

Vatican commentators regard this as exceptionally strong language for a pope to use, and a sign of the undying hatred that "boiling with rage" Petrus has for Paulus. His own "attack poodle" Antonius Spadarus, has joined in the fun, tweeting "Nah, nah, nah, nobody can understand his letters! What a Wormtongue Paulus is!" (a tweet he later deleted).

dog dressed as pope

Blases Cupichus (seen here trying on some clothes "just in case") agrees with Petrus.

On the other hand Father Jacobus Martinus of Jesuitum has commented that he sees nothing wrong with twisting Paulus's words ("It's all in a day's work for a Jesuitan").

Petrus's papacy has long been regarded as controversial. Very early in his papacy, he was sent an enquiry, consisting of three Yes/No "dubia" as follows:

1. You were with Jesus of Galilee, weren't you?

2. Are not you also one of His disciples?

3. Did I not see you in the garden with Him?

Peter denies Christ

Answer the questions, Holy Father!

Although the pope did provide answers to these questions, the answers were considered heretical, and Petrus was later subject to a formal correction - something that would never happen these days, oh no.

A few years later, Paulus made another formal correction of the pope, which he records in his Letter to the Catholic Herald Galatians as follows:

Paul corrects Peter

For this act of insubordination Paulus was exiled to Malta, and later to various other islands scattered round the Mediterranean, although he has continued to send letters to all and sundry.

Petrus has recently described Paulus as "rigid", and questioned his mental health, after Paulus insisted (see Acts 22) that he had been a Roman citizen all his life.

This blog will do its best to keep you up to date with future developments in the biggest crisis to hit the Catholic Church since the time of the Resurrection, when - according to Jacobus Martinus of Jesuitum - feminist icon Mary Magdalene succeeded in taking over the Church.

more garbage from James Martin


  1. I recall some popular theological wisdom about these events.
    Q: why did Jesus resurrected appear to a woman first?
    A: so that the news could spread more quickly.

  2. Could it be she was the first person to visit the Tomb? There has to be a first person. Mind you if you count angels she was 2nd or 3rd. If you count the Roman soldiers who saw the tomb stone rolled back and empty tomb after they fell sleep then precedence must be given to soldiers who were men.

  3. The first person to see the Risen Christ was HIS MOTHER. Jesus told "Mary" to go to the BRETHREN. Instead, "Mary" goes to the DISCIPLES, two distinct groups. Would Magdalene have been disobedient to Jesus?

    No, she would never have been disobedient. She DID go to the disciples, but it was not Jesus Who sent her. The chronology of the scene at the empty tomb is thus:

    1) The Blessed Mother and a few other "Marys" were already at the tomb when Mary Magdalene arrived.
    2) The Blessed Mother gives Magdalene a message to relate to the apostles/disciples, namely: "They have taken away the Lord out of the sepulcher, and we do not know where they have laid Him."
    3) Magdalene immediately goes to the home of Simon Peter and to the home of John to give them the message that she received from the Blessed Mother, then quickly turns around to return to the tomb.
    4) Peter and John rush to the tomb (arriving after the women have left).
    5) Meanwhile the Blessed Mother remains at the tomb and is engaged in a conversation with two angels.
    6) She turns around to see Jesus but does not immediately recognize Him. As she begins to recognize Him, He addresses her as "Woman" which is the same name Adam used for Eve in Genesis 2:23.
    (There are several steps/explanations here about the "gardener" issue and the Greek pronoun EKEINE meaning "this OTHER woman" which is neither Blessed Mother Mary, nor Mary Magdalene, but one of the other I'll skip over that since this is already too long a comment...
    7) Jesus then addresses the Blessed Mother as "Mary", using her proper name, as Adam addressed Eve using her proper name in Genesis 3:20. Thus Jesus crowns the Blessed Mother as the New Eve, NOT Mary Magdalene.
    8) The Blessed Mother recognizes Him, and rushes to Him, but He says, "Do not continue to cling to Me for I am not yet ascended to My Father, but go to the BRETHREN, and say to them, 'I am ascending unto My Father and your Father, to My God and to your God.'" By requesting the Blessed Mother to deliver His words verbatim, Jesus was putting into her mouth the exact words which would foretell her own subsequent Assumption.
    9) Magdalene returns in time to witness the conversation between Jesus and His mother. She recognizes Jesus and says, "Rabboni". She then leaves the scene again to go to the disciples to tell them that she had seen the Lord and to relate to them what Jesus had said to the Blessed Mother.
    10) All the women then leave the scene at the tomb before Peter and John arrive.

    Sorry this is so long. Below is the 22 Sept comment showing that people have stretched the importance of Mary Magdalene:

    In John 19:25, Mary Magdalen is listed LAST among the 4 women present at the Crucifixion, the Blessed Mother being mentioned FIRST. In addition, it seems anomalous that if Mary Magdalen is so central a figure and such an enormous influence on women, she was mentioned, taking all four Gospels into account, only one solitary time before the Crucifixion. The one mention is in Luke 8:1-3 where she is described merely as a woman "out of whom seven devils were gone forth" and who, with other women of wealth, "supported Jesus' endeavors".

    It was the Blessed Mother who was the only woman cited by name as present in the first community of disciples at Pentecost (Acts 1:14). Therefore it seems that Mary, the Mother of Jesus, is the main woman in the Gospels, and the one women should consider a "leader", not Mary Magdalene.

    I addition, considering all the women named Mary in the Garden of the Resurrection referenced (in English, but not the original Greek) as she, she and she and her, her and her, that the Blessed Mother was one of them and was the first to see the Resurrected Christ. It was the Blessed Mother who sent Mary Magdalene to the DISCIPLES while it was Jesus who sent His Mother to the BRETHREN, the disciples and brethren being two distinctly different groups.