This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Saturday 13 October 2018

Spirit of Vatican II to be canonized

It was originally decided to canonize Pope Paul VI, on the basis of his heroic life and many miracles, such as the emptying of the churches, and the opening of the liturgy to all people too lazy to find out what it said in Latin. However, Pope Francis has now decided that it is safest not to canonize a mere mortal, especially one who, like all the popes of the past, disagrees with him on matters of doctrine.

Pius XII and Paul VI

"Apparently, one of us will be a saint."

Instead, it has been decided to canonize the Vatican II council, or at least its representative in Heaven, the Spirit of Vatican II. That way, all the achievements of Vatican II - not exactly its decisions, as these have been largely ignored - are given the imprimatur of "saintly" and cannot be questioned.

This of course opens the way for Pope Francis to implement some of his pet projects, such as the banning of the Latin Mass, the ordination of women, the final rehabilitation of Cardinal McCarrick, etc. etc., all of which can be justified by an appeal to the Spirit of Vatican II.

Spirit of Vatican II

The new saint.

As a form of reflected glory, many people closely associated with Vatican II will now have the status of "blessed"; these include people such as Annibale Bugnini whom it would be difficult to slip into Heaven on their own merits.

Apparently, another of the Pope's idols is also being canonized this weekend. I know nothing about him, apart from what Shakespeare says.

Paul VI and Oscar Romero

"Romero? Romero? Wherefore art thou Romero?"

5 comments:

  1. Just the picture of the "Spirit of Vatican II" is priceless!

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  2. Romero looks to be giving Pauly a Masonic handshake, thumb on the knuckle-the rot was deep.

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  3. That headline had me extremely worried. "Spirit of VII to be canonized". So the Spirit is dead? Noooo! My mouth went dry, my palms started sweating and my stomach made even more strange noises than it normally does. I was just reaching for a brown paper bag to breathe into when it came to me. Oh, the relief! Spirit of VII may be no more but we now have a more than adequate substitute in the shape of the God of Surprises. Talk about changing it up. Spirit of VII may have guided people as they climbed the staircase of ideas but the God of Surprises encourages you to bungee jump off the top.

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  4. Well thank heavens, sez I-- after all the spontaneous devotion, huge ten times yearly "Youth for Paul VI" gatherings, the annual pilgrimages of tens of millions to his hometown & childhood house and tomb, the thousands of best-selling P6 books and devotional manuals, and all the other God-breathed celebration of his life & works (not to mention the answered prayers & thousands of attested miracles.. the rubber stamp committee had trouble choosing just two). Finally, the greatest Pope gets his sainthood. Everyone agrees it really should have been recognized during his life, but.. these things happen.

    Who needs the proper old sainthood process, or 4 attested miracles, or the rigorousness of "The Devil's Advocate", when you have such a remarkable case as this? Next up: noble St. Wuerl The Wonderworker. Santo subito!

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  5. I had neighbors who caught some spirit of Vatican 2 from a Ouija board. Couldn't get rid of it with holy water or even penicillin. They left the Church when the praise band went to guitars and bongos and didn't need their tambourines any more. They come back now and then for communion.

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