This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Saturday 20 April 2024

Compromise found in the Rupnik case

Fr Marko Rupnik, you will recall, is accused of a variety of sexual offences, including rape, some of them so disgusting that even Cardinal Fernández has said "I couldn't have used these ideas in any of my pornographic books - nobody would have believed them."

However he is a GOOD FRIEND of Pope Francis, and must not under any circumstances be laicised, burnt at the stake, or otherwise inconvenienced. And even his dreadful "artwork" is still on prominent display in the Vatican, the Ivereigh Towers Art Gallery, etc. etc.

Luckily, Dr "Expert" Ivereigh has come up with a compromise solution.

Ivereigh tweet 1

"These works raise our minds and hearts to God, so the answer is..."

Ivereigh tweet 2

"... QR codes!"

Yes, from now on, we keep the Rupnik daubs in prominent places, adding a little QR code which conveys the message: "By the way, some Puritan heretics don't like what Rupnik has done, but who are we to judge?"

Rupnik himself has agreed to wear a little lapel badge carrying a QR code (but we don't recommend any ladies to get close enough to scan him), and Ivereigh Towers also has a little QR code on the door warning people about what they may find inside. Cardinal Napier - another Rupnik fan - has agreed to have the QR code sewn into his mitre, as a gesture of solidarity with the "Don't let's be beastly to Marco" campaign.

QR code

The Rupnik QR code - note the traditional merging of two eyes.

As a result of these new ideas, it is possible that the sacrament of Confession will also be modified in the near future, and that people will be allowed to create QR codes linking to a description of their sins, which can be scanned by the priest - surely this is less embarrassing all round?

3 comments:

  1. Everyone that we disapprove of and wish to see concelled and oppressed and made to reside in the ghetto shall be required to sew a yellow QR code onto their jacket.

    Good stuff from Ivereigh about "grace" supplementing sin, not at all heretical I'm sure bruvver, nor is the suggestion that Rupnik's "art" is sufficient to "grace" nonsensical either, surely ?

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  2. One hopes he would get a 'QR' [Quick Response] - and not in code!

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  3. He should have been excommunicated for his "artwork", not for the rest....

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