This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Saturday, 24 September 2011

Bosco is fuond

Dere is grate cerebration in our household becuase de Prodigious Son, viz my dere bruvver Bosco, have been returned to us. He is in a somewhat dazed state, babblin incoherrently, but dat is perfickly normal for him, so we aint worried.

We has been thinkin of killin de fatted claf for Bosco. De Calumny Chappel have got one, but dey wont lend him to us. Here is a pitcher of de beest in quetsion, wot is gonna be saved.

fatted claf

Now I'd better explane what happenned. We got a tellephone call from de local Cathlic Churhc to say dey had kindapped Bosco to stop him savin poeple, dey will stop at nuffink dem Cathlics.

Bein Cathlics and used to methodds of torcher, dey had locked up poor Bosco in a dunngeon. He was keepin up his spirrits by singing hynms about how he was saved, washed in de blud of de Labm, and reddy to collect his golden crown at de check-in at Heaven's Gate. Indeed, he had alreddy sent a prayer to Jessus wiv detales of de mesurements of his head, it aint much fun spendin eternitty wiv a crown dat don't fit.

Bosco in de dunngeon

Well, de Cathlics wanted $10,000 ransome, or dey said dey was gonna send him back to us. "We dont want dis gibberrin idoit singin here all day long," dey said. "We got some seroius iddle-worshippin to get on wiv. Give us de duogh and we'll make sure he dissappears."

De Calumny Chappel was very keen on payin de ransome, as dey said $10,000 was a reel bargian, to be rid of Bosco for ever. But I is a luvvin bruvver and refussed to pay, so dese Cathlic feinds sent Bosco home again. I did suggest dat dey cuold take my Anti Moly in exchange, but dey didnt want her.

Still, dis gave me an idea, and so we has put an advert in de newspapper placin our Anti Moly on de markett.



OLD LADY NOW AVIALABLE TO A GOOD HOME

WE WILL PAY $10,000 IF YOU'LL TAKE HER AWAY

Anti Moly

VERY USEFULL IF YOU NEEDS ANY SCREEMIN DONE

COMES WITH SPARE SET OF FLASE TEETH

FOND OF CHILDDREN, BUT WILL ALSO EAT SNAKES, SCROPIONS, WELL ANYFINK REELY




So far noboddy is very interrested.

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