This is me, Eccles

This is me, Eccles
This is me, Eccles

Thursday, 21 April 2022

Extreme Catholicism

Adapted from Katherine Denkinson's piece about Extreme Catholicism. We read it so you don't have to - you'd probably need a subscription anyway.

Jacob Rees-Mogg is a holier-than-thou [good phrase, eh?] Catholic of the extreme right. For example, his sons are named after saints! [Oops, I seem to be named after a saint too. Let's move on.]


The Two Minutes Hate begins at 11.00.

What else does this hard-right Catholic do? Ah yes, he wishes people a Happy Christmas or a Happy Easter, in order to show how holy he is. Nobody ever wishes ME Happy Christmas, although, taking inspiration from A.A. Milne, I do have a shelf full of cards that I have sent myself! But I would never wish anyone Happy Easter, just in case they mistook me for a hard-right fascist Catholic!

So stop harassing people on Twitter by posting "Happy Easter" messages!

Mogg tweet

I have reported this as a hate crime.

Then Mogg votes against LGBTQSJ marriage, which has been a traditional way of life for the human race ever since the time of, er, the patriarch David Cameron. He opposes abortion too. Are there no limits to this man's holier-than-thou [spits] Catholicism?

Enough, Jacob! We know that you are a Catholic, you don't have to keep telling us by actually believing any of that stuff. Don't give us any of St Paul's Old Testament pearl-clutching horrors! [good phrase, eh?]

Phew! Do you know what he has done now? He has disagreed with the Archbishop of Canterbury's Easter message! Justin Wobbly knows that the true message of Easter is nothing to do with Jesus being born in a manger [memo, check what Catholics actually believe] but can be summarised in four words: BORIS BAD, KEIR GOOD! That's why the holy man (but definitely not holier-than-thou) preached a sermon about sending frightened refugees, fleeing the horrors of, er, France, to Rwanda rather than the Savoy hotel in London - or even the Ritz.

Welby preaching

"If Jesus had existed he would have voted Labour."

I could go on. In fact I am a few lines short, so I'd better keep ranting.

Ah yes, he doesn't like Black Lives Matter, that harmless organization which has done so much to make its members richer by looting and arson. Also he is part of a "War on Woke" - struggling in a hard-right manner to resist Critical Race Theory, the decolonization of teaching (2+2=4 is RACIST), and all the rest.

I think I've said enough. Jacob Rees-Mogg is LITERALLY Torquemada, burning people who refuse to send Christmas cards in April, and persecuting anyone who doesn't attend the Traditional Latin Mass [not sure what this is, but I think it's something to do with being nasty to people in Latin]. Don't trust his friendly Easter greetings!!


  1. Those Catholics! They're not wanted anywhere, but they just keep showing up! And saying things like Merry Christmas, or Happy Easter. Maybe that post author needs to invite a few of them around for a lecture on What Not to Say (or do). Better yet, What Not to Be.

  2. 'Extreme Catholicism' - extremely funny - thanks!