I was explanin dat Bosco had got a new much larger nose, owin to de intervvention of St Peter, and dat dis was a mark of favour from de Lord, meaning dat Bosco is even more saved dan he was before.
One of de friuts of de Spirit was dat we got an e-mail from Damain Thopmson, de editor of de Telegrahp bloggs. Damain met us a few months ago when he was in Callifornia. He was sayin dat dere werent so many religgious bloggs as dere used to be (George Pitcher too worried about his bruvver, Geralld Warner sacked, Cristina Oddone gettin a bit crazy, etc. etc.) Damain himself is only writin bloggs about Joanne Hairy and Rebecka Brooks, so what de Telegrahp needs is an incissive commontater on religious topics.
I cuold do it myself, but Bosco is de master of Engglish prose, de langauge of Shakespare and Jeffrey Archer. Damain said, "Well, before we gives you a contract to write a Telegrahp blogg, could you suggest 10 topics dat you mihgt write about?"
Here is Bosco's list.
1. Cathlics aint saved.
2. Cathlics is idolaters wot kiss statues.
3. Don't be a Cathlic, dey is bad.
4. If you is Cathlic you gotta keep bits of corpses in de fridge.
5. Bosco is saved, Eccles is saved, but de Pop aint saved.
6. Dem Cathlics wont stop worshippin gravven images.
7. Its better to be an athiest dan a Cathlic, you never see dem bowin to images.
8. Look I told you folks, you is gonna go to Hell if you are Cathlic.
9. Didnt de Pop burn 10,000 peeple last week for owning a Bibble?
10. Cathlics! Aintcha sickofem?
Damain was a bit stuned and he said he'd let Bosco know, perhaps it mihgt be better to ask de fammous lawyer chap who keeps writin bloggs complanin about his kids wot cant sing.
Bosco finks I should mention a pssalm from de Book of Chuck, what we recites in our Calumny Chappel worhsip:
Roses is red,
Voilets is blue.
I has been saved,
How about you?
Bosco my dere, de Calumny Chappel is alreddy venerratin you wiv your long nose. Look what we got here.