The best and the worst

Nothing new here, just a list of the winners of all the world cups we have conducted. I will keep it updated as new competitions are held.

BAD HYMNS November 2018

Gold: Lord of the Dance
Silver: Gather us in
Bronze: Shine, Jesus, Shine
Fourth Place: Kumbayah

Sydney Carter, Marty Haugen and Graham Kendrick.

BAD CARDINALS (I) February 2019

Gold: Blase Cupich
Silver: Reinhard Marx
Bronze: Walter Kasper
Fourth Place: Francesco Coccopalmerio

BAD CATHOLIC JOURNALISTS October 2019

Gold: James Martin
Silver: Austen Ivereigh
Bronze: Massimo Faggioli
Fourth Place: Antonio Spadaro

LITURGICAL ABUSES July 2020

Gold: Idols
Silver: Changing words in the liturgy
Bronze: Communion in the hand
Fourth Place: Consecrating ordinary bread

UGLY CHURCHES November 2020

Gold: St Francis de Sales, Norton Shores, Michigan
Silver: Eglise Sainte Bernadette du Banlay
Bronze: Newman Hall, Holy Spirit, Berkeley
Fourth Place: Parroquia Santa Monica, Rivas-Vaciamadrid

FRANCIS ACHIEVEMENTS September 2021

Gold: Pachamama worship
Silver: Traditionis Custodes
Bronze: Treatment of the church in China
Fourth Place: Rehabilitating Uncle Ted McCarrick

INSTRUMENTS IN HELL March 2022

Gold: Vuvuzela
Silver: Bongo drums
Bronze: Kazoo
Fourth Place: Tambourine

PATRON SAINTS OF ENGLAND May 2022

Gold: Thomas More
Silver: Thomas Becket
Bronze: John Fisher
Fourth Place: John Henry Newman

BAD CARDINALS (II) October 2022

Gold: Blase Cupich
Silver: Arthur Roche
Bronze: Reinhard Marx
Fourth Place: Francesco Coccopalmerio

UNCROWNED SAINTS April 2023

Gold: Pope Leo XIII
Silver: Thomas à Kempis
Bronze: Pope Pius XII
Fourth Place: G.K. Chesterton

ROYAL SAINTS July 2023

Gold: Jadwiga of Poland
Silver: Elizabeth of Hungary
Bronze: Stephen I of Hungary
Fourth Place: Louis IX of France

SYNODAL HORRORS September 2023

Gold: Abp Víctor Fernández
Silver: Fr James Martin
Bronze: Cdl Arthur Roche
Fourth Place: Dr Austen Ivereigh

SYNOD JARGON December 2023

Gold: a new way of being Church
Silver: a kenotic de-centering
Bronze: a listening Church
Fourth Place: respects the protagonism of the Spirit

BAD CATHOLIC WRITERS March 2024

Gold: Víctor Manuel Fernández
Silver: Austen Ivereigh
Bronze: James Martin
Fourth Place: Massimo Faggioli

MISUSED CHURCHES April 2024

Gold: Borgloon (Belgium), Holy cow
Silver: New York, God is trans
Bronze: St Edmundsbury, Masonic dinner
Fourth Place: Rochester, Crazy golf

GREAT CATHOLIC LEADERS June 2024

Gold: Cardinal Sarah
Silver: Cardinal Zen
Bronze: Bishop Schneider
Fourth Place: Cardinal Müller

LATIN MASS LETTER-WRITERS July 2024

Gold: Sir James MacMillan
Silver: Princess Michael of Kent
Bronze: Tom Holland
Fourth Place: Dame Kiri Te Kanawa

BAD HYMNS October 2024

Gold: Mary, did you know?
Silver: Gather us in.
Bronze: All are welcome.
Fourth Place: Lord of the Dance.

SYNODAL JARGON (2024) November 2024

Gold: forgiveness in the name of all the baptised for the sins against synodality
Silver: the principle of circularity that animated the whole synodal process
Bronze: athletes and standard-bearers of synodality
Fourth Place: understanding how to be a synodal church in mission thus passes through a relational conversion

POST-BIBLICAL SAINTS January 2025

Gold: Thomas Aquinas
Silver: Augustine of Hippo
Bronze: Benedict of Nursia
Fourth Place: Teresa of Ávila

SUBJECTS FOR PAPAL DOCUMENTS February 2025

Gold: Abortion and IVF
Silver: Persecution of Christians
Bronze: Same-sex marriage
Fourth Place: Surrogacy

NARNIA POLL April 2025

Gold: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
Silver: The Last Battle
Bronze: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader
Fourth Place: Prince Caspian

NAME THAT POPE May 2025

A dead heat between Leo and Gregory.
John and Clement in 3rd and 4th places.

We got Leo right. More-or-less.

PREDICT THE POPE May 2025

Gold: Pizzaballa
Silver: Erdő
Sarah and Eijk in 3rd and 4th places.

We didn't call this one correctly.

UGLY CHURCHES (2nd contest) September 2025

Gold: Newman Hall, Holy Spirit, Berkeley, USA
Silver: Maria, Koenigin des Friedens, Velbert-Neviges, Germany
Bronze: Rosa Aufblasbare Kirche, Vreden, Germany
Fourth Place: St Konrad, Schaffhausen, Switzerland

CONTROVERSIAL SAINTS October 2025

Gold: Pope Paul VI
Silver: Pope John XXIII
Bronze: Oscar Romero
Fourth Place: Carlo Acutis

CATHOLIC CONVERTS May 2026

Gold: St John Henry Newman
Silver: St Edmund Campion
Bronze: St Edith Stein
Fourth Place: G.K. Chesterton

The best eight converts

Twitter polls don't seem to be working too well at present (maybe only 1 in 4 votes are recorded) but anyway, here are the last eight in the World Cup of Catholic Converts.The result of the final rounds will be recorded when we have them.

QUARTER-FINALS

Edmund Campion 80.0 v Elizabeth Ann Seton 20.0

Gerard Manley Hopkins 10.6 v John Henry Newman 89.4

Edith Stein 74.4 v Alec Guinness 25.6

Evelyn Waugh 28.2 v Gilbert Chesterton 71.8

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SEMI-FINALS

Edmund Campion 61.8 v Edith Stein 38.2

John Henry Newman 64.5 v Gilbert Chesterton 35.5

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THIRD PLACE PLAYOFF

Edith Stein 53.1 v Gilbert Chesterton 46.9

BRONZE medal for Edith, so all the medals will be taken by saints.

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FINAL

Edmund Campion 49.5 v John Henry Newman 50.5

In the end there was only one vote in it. GOLD for Newman, SILVER for Campion.

A happy reunion in Heaven.

The World Cup of Catholic Converts

Some people approve of Catholic converts; others, like Austen Ivereigh, think they are neurotic. Anyway, it's time for another world cup, once again to be conducted by Twitter (X) polls. There is room for a few more nominations: the conditions are that the convert (1) must be dead, and (2) must have converted in adultood (also, must be reasonably well known, so don't nominate your great-aunt unless she's famous). Let's keep things post-Reformation to avoid St Matthew, St Paul, or St Augustine of Hippo running away with the whole thing. Also, my decision is final.

Alec Guinness as GKC's Father Brown.

So far I have the following nominees:

Alec Guinness
Augustus Pugin
Avery Dulles
Buffalo Bill Cody
Claud McKay
Dorothy Day
Edith Nesbit
Edith Stein
Evelyn Waugh
Frederick William Faber
G.K. Chesterton
Gary Cooper
Gerard Manley Hopkins
Graham Greene
John Henry Newman
John Wayne
Malcolm Muggeridge
Mortimer Adler
Muriel Spark
Oscar Wilde
Robert Hugh Benson
Ronald Knox
Siegfried Sassoon
Thomas Merton

Buffalo Bill Cody

Nominations may be made by replying to this post, or to its advert on Twitter.

The World Cup of Controversial Saints

The results are at the end of this post.

Let's get one thing straight before we start. Once someone is canonized, it is up to Catholics (at least) to accept that this is an infallible decision. So we are not talking about people you want to de-canonize, but rather about those whose canonization has at some time been questioned. Possibly for one of the following reasons:

1. They may never have existed.

2. It was too soon, and their case was not properly examined.

3. They were at some time accused of heresy or blasphemy.

And so on. So if you are taking part in the Twitter/X poll, you may wish to think of saints you are least likely to call upon; these are not the saints who are in Heaven but sitting in the back row or behind a pillar (such places are occupied by those who are so far only Beatified).

The Plains of Heaven, by John Martin.

Here is my list so far, received from various sources. Further nominations welcome, preferably with evidence that someone didn't think they should be canonized.

Carlo Acutis
Christopher
Conus
Edith Stein
Faustina Kawalska
John Henry Newman
Josemaría Escrivá
Junípero Serra
King Louis IX of France
Maximilian Kolbe
Mother Teresa
Oscar Romero
Philomena
Pope Celestine V
Pope Gregory VII
Pope John XXIII
Pope John-Paul II
Pope Paul VI
Thomas Aquinas
Thomas More

I repeat, this is NOT an invitation to slag off saints. And my personal views don't enter here. We'll start the World Cup soon after the World Cup of Ugly Churches ends.

The Plains of Hell, by James Martin.

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The super-sixes were as follows:

Oscar Romero 32.3% -- Josemaría Escrivá 8.3% -- Pope Paul VI 59.4%

Pope John XXIII 53.6% -- Henry II, Holy Roman Emperor 21.7% -- Carlo Acutis 24.7%

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Third place playoff

Oscar Romero 69.1 v Carlo Acutis 30.9

Bronze gets an Oscar! I mean, Oscar gets the Bronze.

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FINAL

Pope Paul VI 59.5 v Pope John XXIII 40.5

In this Vatican II finale, Paul gets the gold medal, and John the silver.

"Congratulations, but I didn't really want the gold medal, anyway."

The eight ugliest churches

We have reached the quarter-finals of the 2nd World Cup of Ugly Churches, and the results will be posted here as we have them.

High-heel wedding church, Budai, Taiwan 42.9 v St Konrad, Schaffhausen, Switzerland 57.1

St Maurice, Marseille, France 49.7 v Maria, Koenigin des Friedens, Velbert-Neviges, Germany 50.3

Newman Hall, Holy Spirit, Berkeley, USA 79.9 v Santa Maria Nuova, Terranuova Bracciolini, Italy 20.1

Rosa Aufblasbare Kirche, Vreden, Germany 62.8 v St Francis de Sales, Norton Shores, Michigan, USA 37.2

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SEMI-FINALS

St Konrad, Schaffhausen, Switzerland 29.9 v Newman Hall, Holy Spirit, Berkeley, USA 70.1

Maria, Koenigin des Friedens, Velbert-Neviges, Germany 57.5 v Rosa Aufblasbare Kirche, Vreden, Germany 42.5

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THIRD PLACE PLAY-OFF

St Konrad, Schaffhausen, Switzerland 48.6 v Rosa Aufblasbare Kirche, Vreden, Germany 51.4

An inflatable bronze medal for the pink church.

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FINAL

Newman Hall, Holy Spirit, Berkeley, USA 55.0 v Maria, Koenigin des Friedens, Velbert-Neviges, Germany 45.0

So Newman Hall is officially the ugliest church in the world (this time - last time it only came 3rd).

A final photo for your spiritual nourishment.

Predict the Pope!

Another rather rushed World Cup to predict whom the cardinals will choose at the conclave starting on May 7th. Rather than listing all eligible people (1.5 billion Catholics) I have gone for the 12 who have been named in most lists of papabile cardinals. These are:

Besungu
Bo
Eijk
Erdő
Parolin
Pizzaballa
Prevost
Ranjith
Sarah
Tagle
Turkson
Zuppi

Meanwhile, Cardinal Parolin already knows who will be chosen. Here he is wearing Pope Francis's mitre at the Youth Sunday Mass in St Peter's Square.

"Just call me Francis II"

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SEMIFINALS

Pizzaballa 76.3 v Eijk 23.7

Sarah 42.2 v Erdő 57.8

FINAL

Pizzaballa 58.9 v Erdő 41.1

Pierbattista Pizzaballa gets the job. Good luck - you'll need it!

ADDENDUM: Well, in fact it was Robert Prevost.

"Name that Pope" World Cup

There has been too much speculation over who will be the next man in the hot seat - from seven lists that I have seen, the most-nominated people are:

Erdő, Parolin 6,
Tagle 5,
Turkson, Zuppi 4,
Besungu, Bo, Eijk, Pizzaballa, Prevost, Sarah 3,

so it probably won't be any of those.

Time for another Pope Linus?

Instead, we're holding a World Cup to see whether we can guess the name that the next Pope will take. The obvious choice is Eccles, but in fact the 24 nominees are:

Adrian
Alexander
Benedict
Boniface
Clement
Eugene
Felix
Francis
Gregory
Innocent
John
John-Paul
Julius
Leo
Martin
Nicholas
Paul
Peter
Pius
Sergius
Sixtus
Stephen
Theodore
Urban

and if we are quick we can get a decision in time for the white smoke.

Some people will never be happy.

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SEMIFINALS

John 48.9 v Leo 51.1

Clement 40.4 v Gregory 59.6

FINAL

Leo 50.0 v Gregory 50.0

A dead heat. Let's leave it as that. The next pope is going to be Leo XIV or Gregory XVII (unless he's not very good at Roman numerals).

ADDENDUM: Well, those who said Leo XIV got it right!

Narnia poll

There is apparently a Narnia movie forthcoming on Netflix, produced by Greta Gerwig, which will star the actress Meryl Streep in the role of Aslan.

Obviously female.

A modest rewriting of the Wikipedia article on The Last Battle gives us this:

In the western regions of Narnia, the clever and greedy ape Gerwig persuades the naive donkey Streep to wear a lion's skin, and introduces her to the other Narnians as the Great Lion Aslan.

To celebrate this inspired casting, a mini Twitter poll will be held to decide on the people's favourite of the seven Narnia books.

Actually, a much more controversial poll would be to decide on the proper order in which to read C.S. Lewis's work. Do we put The Magician's Nephew first? Or last? Or penultimate? I'm not getting into that dispute.

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RESULTS AS THEY COME IN.

SEMI-FINALS

The Voyage of the Dawn Treader 42.3 v The Last Battle 57.7

Prince Caspian 11.0 v The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe 89.0

FINAL

The Last Battle 21.3 v The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe 78.7

So the first book was the best, and the last book the second best!

Pope Francis writes a letter (and another World Cup)

As we all know, Pope Francis is not a great fan of Donald Trump - he would prefer the Catholic policies of Kamala Harris (e.g. abortion, LGBT activism, transgender stuff) to the less fashionable ideas of Donald. No, it's not his renaming of the Gulf of Mexico or the threat to take over Greenland (or was it Canada?) that he objects to, but to his immigration policies, notably the deporting of illegal immigrants because they were in the US, er, illegally.

"We're the best of friends, really!"

Anyway, the Holy Father dashed off a letter to the US Bishops' Conference telling them that they should all support the Democrats and be as nasty to Trump as possible. To their credit, they were having none of this, and Archbishop Timothy Broglio, dashed off a closely-argued rebuttal, as follows:

 
Dear Sir or Madam,
   Thank you for your letter of the 10th Inst.
It has been filed.
   Yours faithfully,
   Tim Broglio, for the USCCB.

"It has been filed."

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So, inspired by an idea from @Aletheiaholic, we now have another World Cup - just a Miniature one with 8 entrants.

If you were Pope Francis writing a Papal Document, which of these issues should have your priority?

The possibilities are (in the order produced by my randomizer):

Persecution of Christians;
Abortion and IVF;
Divorce among Catholics;
Assisted Suicide;
Immigration policy;
Eugenics;
Surrogacy;
Same-sex marriage.

The results of the semi-finals etc. will be posted here as they come in.

"Whatever he writes, it reminds me of talking about sex with someone just getting to puberty."

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SEMI-FINALS

Abortion and IVF 78.1 v Surrogacy 21.9

Persecution of Christians 62.1 v Same-sex marriage 37.9

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THIRD PLACE PLAYOFF

Surrogacy 42.4 v Same-sex marriage 57.6

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FINAL

Abortion and IVF 54.4 v Persecution of Christians 45.6

So there we have it.

The top eight saints

We started the World Cup of post-Biblical saints with 96 fairly good saints, and are now down to the 8 very good ones who have made it through to the quarter-finals. This post will give you the results as they come in. First, the contestants, with links to Wikipedia biographies.

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Benedict of Nursia, 480-547, Rule of St Benedict.

Maximilian Kolbe, 1894-1941, martyr at Auschwitz.

Teresa of Ávila, 1515-1582, nun, Doctor of the Church.

Thérèse of Lisieux, 1873-1897, little flower, Carmelite.

Thomas More, 1478-1535, man for all seasons.

Augustine of Hippo, 354-430, Doctor of the Church.

Francis of Assisi, 1181-1226, founded the Franciscans.

St Thomas Aquinas, 1225-1274, Doctor of the Church.

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QUARTER-FINAL RESULTS

Benedict of Nursia 65.0 v Maximilian Kolbe 35.0

Teresa of Ávila 54.9 v Thérèse of Lisieux 45.1

Thomas More 28.0 v Augustine of Hippo 72.0

Francis of Assisi 23.3 v Thomas Aquinas 76.7

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SEMI-FINALS

Benedict of Nursia 37.6 v Thomas Aquinas 62.4

Teresa of Ávila 26.8 v Augustine of Hippo 73.2

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THIRD PLACE PLAYOFF

Benedict of Nursia 61.9 v Teresa of Ávila 38.1

BRONZE medal for Benedict!

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FINAL

Thomas Aquinas 61.4 v Augustine of Hippo 38.6

GOLD MEDAL for Thomas Aquinas, SILVER for Augustine of Hippo!

The World Cup of post-Biblical saints - nominations requested

I am asking for trouble here, as I shall probably be swamped with nominations.

I decided to make this world cup post-Biblical, first because the Blessed Virgin Mary would certainly win otherwise, and second because even if she were excluded, we'd only end up with final rounds including obvious people like Peter, Paul, James and John (at a guess).

This is what a saint looks like.

NOMINATION RULES.

1. Only saints not mentioned in the Bible will be allowed to enter.

2. You may nominate up to 3 canonized saints (no mere blesseds, please!) If you nominate more then only the first 3 will be recorded. Please nominate either by replying to this blog posting, or by replying to the advert in Twitter/X. I will probably not reply to you, but I will take note of legitimate nominations.

3. No changing your mind - I don't want to fiddle around with last-minute changes. What you say first, goes.

4. I shall add a few top saints of my own, if they are omitted.

5. Voting will be by means of Twitter polls as in previous world cups.

6. My decision on all things is final, not to say infallible.

This is what another saint looks like.

ADDENDUM: After 3 days we have 96 entries, which is a convenient number, so nominations are now closed. The World Cup will start within the next day or two.

The 2024 World Cup of Synod Jargon

On about October 8th, when we have decided what the worst hymn is, we shall start the 2024 World Cup of Synod Jargon. The 2023 World Cup voters decided that "a new way of being Church" was the winner, and "a kenotic de-centering" came second. This year's World Cup will include 16 new entrants received since the previous World Cup, and exclude all the 2023 heroes. After all, a key principle of synodality is to reject everything that was good in the past.

Here we go again!

The sixteen extrants are:

a real Copernican turning point
a snippet of 'conversation in the spirit'
a multidimensional impact on churches
a new theology which gives 'flavour'
athletes of synodality
breathe synodality into academic theology
circularity animated the synodal process
discernment is synodal
forgiveness for the sins against synodality
mission is always synodal
passes through a relational conversion
preserve harmony in your discernment
socio-cultural diversity in a multifaceted church
teaching us to be bread for others
the synodal methodology of conversation
which aspect of 'PLACE' is important?

For practical reasons (because the entrants are quite long they are hard to fit into a tweet), there will be a simple knockout competition conducted by Twitter polls, and no group stages.

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SEMI-FINALS, with the full version of each bit of jargon. Illustrations produced by the Copilot AI program.

forgiveness in the name of all the baptised for the sins against synodality 83

understanding how to be a synodal church in mission thus passes through a relational conversion 17

athletes and standard-bearers of synodality 41.2

the principle of circularity that animated the whole synodal process 58.8

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THIRD PLACE PLAYOFF

understanding how to be a synodal church in mission thus passes through a relational conversion 45.9
athletes and standard-bearers of synodality 54.1 BRONZE MEDAL

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FINAL

forgiveness in the name of all the baptised for the sins against synodality 72 GOLD MEDAL
the principle of circularity that animated the whole synodal process 28 SILVER MEDAL

Eight hymns you don't want to sing

So we have reached the quarter-finals of the 2024 World Cup of Bad Hymns, and here are the remaining atrocities, with some useful descriptions.

Lord of the Dance (Sydney Carter)

The winner in 2018. Basically a load of semi-heretical nonsense from beginning to end. Most cringeworthy line is perhaps "It's hard to dance with the devil on your back," but the whole attempt to reduce Christ's ministry to a dance is sick-making.

FACT: It's hard to dance with anyone on your back.

Shine, Jesus, shine (Graham Kendrick)

Bronze medallist in 2018. This one contributed to my changing churches about 20 years ago. Many irritating lines such as "Shine on me, shine on me" and "Flow, river, flow". Sorry, I am still traumatized.

Let us build a house where love can dwell (All are welcome) (Marty Haugen)

One of the two works by Mr Haugen to reach the last eight. Not well known in the UK, as far as I can tell, but in the USA he deserves a restraining order to stop him writing anything more. This one goes on far too long without more than one idea in the whole piece.

Kumbayah (anon)

Fourth place in 2018. Let's face it, if you had written such tosh you would want to be anonymous too. "Someone's giggling Lord, Kumbayah". All right, I made that bit up.

You just know they're dying to sing "Kumbayah".

On eagle's wings (Michael Joncas)

Again, not known to me by experience. Wikipedia says that Joe Biden likes it, which suggests that it's more likely to be about ice-cream than God. As far as I can tell, it consists of some chunks of Psalm 91 set to a banal tune.

Here in this place new light is streaming (Gather us in) (Marty Haugen)

Haugen's second entry in the last eight, silver medallist in 2018. The cumulative effect of lines such as "We are the young, our lives are a mystery" (apparently there to provide a rhyme with "history" two lines later) must be enough to cause temporary insanity.

Come to the feast of Heaven and Earth (table of plenty) (Daniel Schutte)

If I'd had to choose one of the three pieces of Schutte in this contest, I'd have gone for "I, the Lord of sea and sky (here I am, Lord)", but this one is atrocious too. Can people sing words like "O come and eat without money; come to drink without price" without giggling?

Mary, did you know? (Mark Lowry)

On Twitter/X I see more tweets from people who hate this patronizing hymn than about any other song apart from the Satanists' anthem "Imagine". Yes, she did know, you great gibbon.

Some spiritual nourishment (there's not been any so far in this post).

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THE RESULTS AS THEY COME IN:

QUARTER-FINALS

Lord of the Dance 72.1 v Shine, Jesus, shine 27.9

All are welcome 62.3 v Kumbayah 37.7

On eagle's wings 41.6 v Gather us in 58.4

Table of plenty 28.7 v Mary, did you know? 71.3

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SEMI-FINALS

Lord of the Dance 44.3 v Gather us in 55.7

All are welcome 41.2 v Mary, did you know? 58.8

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THIRD PLACE PLAY-OFF

Lord of the Dance 45.5 v All are welcome 54.5

BRONZE MEDAL for "All are Welcome".

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FINAL

Gather us in 47.2 v Mary, did you know? 52.8

GOLD for "Mary, did you know?" and SILVER for "Gather us in."

The second World Cup of Bad Hymns

As a distraction from all the other problems in the world, we'll have another world cup. I had planned a sumptuous opening ceremony, with Pachamama idols and Rupnik artwork, but, after complaints about bad taste from the Olympic Committee I decided to scrap it.

Anyway, as promised, the second world cup of bad hymns will begin soon. The first one, held in 2018, ended as follows:

Gold: Lord of the Dance (Sydney Carter)
Silver: Gather us in (Marty Haugen)
Bronze: Shine, Jesus, Shine (Graham Kendrick)
Fourth Place: Kumbayah (anon)

The previous winners.

As before, this one will organised by a sequence of Twitter polls, one per day, on a knock-out basis, with as many rounds as needed.

Badness may be defined any way you wish, either by stupid lyrics, bad theology (since people of all Christian denominations - or none - may take part, we won't get agreement here), or even by an appalling tune.

I started with 44 nominations (everything that reached Round 2 last time, plus a few others that I particularly dislike). Nominations will close when we reach 64, or people stop sending them in - either by replying to this post or by replying to the Twitter announcement.

Anything that makes you shudder...

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Here are the ones we have so far (I am adding new ones as they arrive):

Abba, Abba Father, You are the Potter, we are the clay,  Carey Landry
Alleluia Ch-Ch,  Paul Inwood
As a fire is meant for burning,  Ruth Duck
As the deer pants,  Martin Nystrom
Autumn days when the grass is jewelled,  Estelle White
Bind us together, Lord,  Bob Gillman
Caterpillar, caterpillar,  Susan Sayers
Cheep! said the sparrow on the chimney top,  Estelle White
Christ be our light,  Bernadette Farrell
Colours of day,  Sue McClellan
Come to the feast of Heaven and Earth (table of plenty),  Daniel Schutte
Eat this bread,  Jacques Berthier
Enemy of apathy (she sits like a bird),  John L. Bell and Graham Maule
Father, in my life I see,  Frank Andersen
Follow me,  Michael Cocket
For everyone born, a place at the table,  Shirley Murray
Gather us in,  Marty Haugen
Gift of finest wheat,  John Michael Talbot
Gloria (clap clap),  Martin Anderson
Glory to God (Peruvian Gloria),  Anon
Go, the Mass is ended,  Sister Marie Lydia Pereira
God of concrete,  Frederick R.C. Clarke
God of mercy and compassion,  Edmund Vaughan
God's Spirit is in my heart,  Alan Dale
I am the Bread of Life,  Suzanne Toolan
I am the Living Bread,  Ifeanyichukwu Eze
I am the Word that spoke (take and eat),  Michael Joncas
I just wanna be a sheep,  Brian Howard
I saw the grass, I saw the trees,  Estelle White
I watch the sunrise,  John Glynn
I, the Lord of sea and sky (here I am, Lord),  Daniel Schutte
If I were a butterfly,  Brian Howard
In bread we bring you, Lord,  Daniel O'Donnell
In Christ alone my hope is found, Stuart Townend and Keith Getty 
In my wrestling and in my doubts (my Lighthouse),  Llewellyn / Gilkeson
Jesus Christ the apple tree,  R.H.
Kumbayah,  Anon
Let there be peace on Earth,  Vince Gill
Let us build a house where love can dwell (all are welcome),  Marty Haugen
Let us build the city of God,  Daniel Schutte
Lord of the Dance,  Sydney Carter
Lord, you have come to the lakeshore/lakeside,  Cesáreo Gabaráin
Mary, did you know?  Mark Lowry
Moses, I know you're the man,  Estelle White
No longer strangers to each other (companions on the journey),  Carey Landry 
Now we remain,  David Haas
On eagle's wings,  Michael Joncas
One bread, one body,  John Foley
Our God reigns,  Leonard E. Smith
Shine, Jesus, shine,  Graham Kendrick
Sing a New Church,  Delores Dufner
Springs of water, bless the Lord,  Marty Haugen
The Lord told Noah (so rise and shine),  Trad.
The world is full of smelly feet,  Michael Forster
They'll know we are Christians by our love,  Peter Scholtes
This little light of mine,  Harry Dixon Loes
Touch the earth lightly,  Shirley Murray
Walk in the Light,  Damian Lundy
We are the salt of the earth (go make a difference),  Steve Angrisano, 
   Tom Tomaszek
We rise again from ashes,  Tom Conry
Who is the alien,  Mary Louise Bringle
Will you let me be your servant,  Richard Gillard
You are mine,  David Haas
You call me out upon the waters (oceans),  Joel Houston et al

"The next hymn is ... so put your hand up if you want to leave."

Addendum: We'll stick to English language hymns (and Christian ones) to avoid strange songs from people worshipping Klingon gods.

Addendum-dum: We now have 64 entries, and that's the lot.

Quick World Cup of Latin Mass Letter Writers

As is probably well known to most readers, 48 fairly famous people, mostly from the world of writing, music and politics, signed a letter to the Times, making an appeal to the Pope to stop stamping on the Traditional Latin Mass and its adherents (I paraphrase here). This was similar to the "Agatha Christie" letter addressed to Pope Paul VI in 1971, which was largely succesful in its results.

But what should we call this letter, or rather, after whom? The 48 noble signatories are listed below, and I intend to conduct a quick world cup - I want to get it done in 2 weeks, so the rules will be slightly different - to choose one of the names.

Some are very well known, some rather obscure, but I think they all have Wikipedia entries, if you need any help working out who they are. I don't expect this Quick World Cup to be as popular as some others - for example the new World Cup of Bad Hymns, due to run in August - but I will bear this sorrow courageously.

The 48 runners are:

Robert Agostinelli
Lord Alton of Liverpool
Lord Bailey of Paddington
Lord Bamford
Lord Berkeley of Knighton
Sophie Bevan
Ian Bostridge
Nina Campbell
Meghan Cassidy
Sir Nicholas Coleridge
Dame Imogen Cooper
Lord Fellowes of West Stafford
Sir Rocco Forte
Lady Antonia Fraser
Martin Fuller
Lady Getty
John Gilhooly
Dame Jane Glover
Michael Gove
Susan Hampshire
Lord Hesketh
Tom Holland
Sir Stephen Hough
Tristram Hunt
Steven Isserlis
Bianca Jagger
Igor Levit
Lord Lloyd-Webber
Julian Lloyd Webber
Dame Felicity Lott
Sir James MacMillan
Princess Michael of Kent
Baroness Monckton of Dallington Forest
Lord Moore of Etchingham
Fraser Nelson
Alex Polizzi
Mishka Rushdie Momen
Sir Andras Schiff
Lord Skidelsky
Lord Smith of Finsbury
Sir Paul Smith
Rory Stewart
Lord Stirrup
Dame Kiri Te Kanawa
Dame Mitsuko Uchida
Ryan Wigglesworth
A N Wilson
Adam Zamoyski

And this was the letter (you can click to enlarge).

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QUALIFIERS FOR THE SUPER SIX, AS THEY COME IN.

FINAL RESULTS LISTED AFTER THE PHOTOS.

Dame Kiri Te Kanawa

Sir James MacMillan

Princess Michael of Kent

Lord Alton of Liverpool

Tom Holland

Lady Antonia Fraser

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Group 1:
Dame Kiri Te Kanawa 28.2
Princess Michael of Kent 42.7
Tom Holland 29.1

Group 2:
Sir James MacMillan 60.8
Lord Alton of Liverpool 21.6
Lady Antonia Fraser 17.5

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FINAL

Princess Michael of Kent 45.5 v Sir James MacMillan 54.5

So congratulations to the new Agatha Christie, Sir James MacMillan!